Neighbour keeps looking over fence into our garden
Myself and my husband moved into our first home at the start of 2025. We introduced ourselves to both neighbours by knocking on doors and had a friendly chat with both. Both sets of neighbours are retired couples and very nice.
The couple we are attached to (semi-detached house) have been here since the houses were built in the 70's. The wife loves a chat and is a bit of a curtain twitcher. She will always start a long conversation if she sees us working in the front garden or we see her coming in from the car - no problem!
Last year, she popped her head over the fence to speak to us while we were gardening in our back garden. Made us jump (and I told her this) but didn't think too much of it. We were digging out some concrete and making noise so it made sense she wanted to know what was happening. This happened a couple of times over the summer but didn't really both us too much.
Fast forward to the Bank Holiday weekend just gone. She put her head over our fence 3 times in a weekend. She goes to the end of their garden where the ground is higher and leans over the fence so we can see her from the waist up. She shouts the name of whoever is sitting in the garden and starts up a conversation. All 3 of these occasions were her offering us things (spare plants, then a spare hanging basket and finally compost for the basket). I appreciate she is being generous and kind but it feels like such an invasion of our privacy and I didn't feel comfortable relaxing in the garden in case she popped up again. I wasn't wearing much as it was so hot and at times me and my husband were kissing or cuddling and it felt awkward like a parent catching us!
I accepted the plants and my husband the basket, but when she offered the compost I said no as I didn't want to keep encouraging her. The last time she put her head over we were cooking a bbq and it was 8pm. She started asking us what we were cooking and telling us about her dinner. She didn't take the hint when we barely replied.
I now find myself trying to be super quiet when in the garden so she doesn't know I'm there. I'm not sure what to do as I'm not confrontational and I don't want to ruin the relationship we've built with them but I can't relax in my own garden. We bought the house because its not overlooked!
Current plan for long term is to build a pergola by the fence and put trellis and climbing plants on it to block where she hangs over.
EDIT: I didnt realise there was a "neighboursfromheck" sub. I am aware this is not helllish behaviour but wasn't sure where else to post. I was very frustrated by it over the weekend and wanted to vent.