AITA for having double standards?
I (26F) recently (March) moved in with my husband (28M) and his housemate.
We generally have a good understanding of roles in our relationship and there are certain things we do individually because we want them done:
I.e I make the bed every day because husband doesn’t believe in making beds as we “are just getting back into it”
He cleans the floors because he hates the feeling of dirt under his feet and likes walking barefoot.
Then, we share the task of Cooking & Dishes
However - I have been the only one cleaning up the kitchen (wiping counters, stove, tidying up etc) after the cooking and he only washes dishes when he knows he is cooking.
I have also been the only one doing our washing.
While I understand there are some roles/tasks we do individually, I have asked him MULTIPLE times to help with the washing and complained about them not cleaning up after themselves after cooking.
He then said he doesn’t feel the need to do washing as much as I do because he has a lot of clothes and would only wash every 2 or so weeks. We live in a small apartment with our housemate in London and do not have enough space to hang up 2 weeks of both of our washing. It also piles up and takes up a lot of space in our already small room.
He also was not saying thank you to me when I was doing it which upset me as I feel he is entitled. We have fought numerous times about me not feeling like he helps and he said I should “just ask him”?!! Which I think if very unfair when it’s a shared space. Why should I have to ask an adult to clean up after themselves or help with washing?
After many fights of this and me grumpily doing washing - he has started saying thank you, which he thinks is a nice thing and in theory is good - BUT he still has not changed his actions of helping with those things.
So AITA for getting annoyed when he says thank you?