he’s not the sweet boy i once loved before
i broke with my ex a year ago and at that time i wasn’t really a great person . i was dishonest and unloyal i guess but i never meant it in a way that wanted to hurt him. i never wanted to hurt his feelings but there are things i did behind his back. i wasn’t a good person . i was an avoidant i gave my best to love him. i can say it surely that i gave my everything for him. i loved him as someone that was special i thought he was the sweetest person ever and thought i would never find someone like him again. he changed my perceptions of love when my parents got divorced. they never truly loved each other and when he loved me and showed me that he cared i was really happy. i never felt that way before. but because of how i can’t take it when things get too good. i kept breaking up and making up with him. things got really messy and while i was talking to him as a friend for a while after our breakup. i talked to him about the guys i was seeing.
about few months after our break up i decided to text him because i missed him but he was like a completely different person. he became a cocky big ego, overly confident guy that thinks he knows what he’s doing. but when he was with me he was a gentleman. i don’t know why this happened but he talk different he act different. the way he was talking to me was just so off putting that i don’t even recognize him anymore.
he said he started to see other girls and i supposed they were just flings or they dont really last long term? he told me the girl he dated didn’t feel the same and he broke up with her. after that i knew it was really over.
it was painful i wanted him back i told myself im not gonna be the person i was before i wanted that sweet boy back but about 7 months later i was finally able to move on from him.
but he texted me again.
he asked me if im going on a school trip to his city (he lives in a different city as me, we were long distance) just bluntly i was so flabbergasted no hello no nothing this time it’s even worse now. he became cold and ignorant and just so weird it started to scare me. he said i’m not trying to get back with you he just saying sorry but why would someone just bluntly ask this to their ex that has BEEN NO CONTACT FOR OVER 7 MONTHS. i thought it was over it really is over. i could feel that there’s no more love left. he just sounded like a complete different man in a worse way and i figured this is just his way of coping. getting in and out of relationships to get over things but he will never get that feeling of being vulnerable and loved bcus he had completely masked himself.