Worried about my boyfriend health
I’m not really sure what to do anymore and I could use some outside opinions because I feel like I might be overthinking this, but I also can’t shake the worry.
Over the past little while I’ve noticed my boyfriend’s eyes and skin sometimes look slightly yellowish. It’s not super obvious all the time, but it’s noticeable enough to me that it’s been sitting in the back of my mind. I know yellowing can sometimes be a sign of jaundice or liver issues, so I finally brought it up to him because I was genuinely worried about his health. When I mentioned it, he got pretty defensive and irritated. He insisted he’s fine, said nothing is wrong, and basically shut the conversation down. I tried to explain I wasn’t accusing him of anything, just worried, but it didn’t really go anywhere. Since then, he’s made it clear he doesn’t want to talk about it and refuses to go to the doctor. On top of that, he has been feeling unwell a lot more lately. He seems tired all the time, doesn’t really want to eat, has been throwing up somewhat regularly, and often complains about stomach or general body pain. This has made me even more worried that something could actually be going on medically, not just the eye/skin color change I noticed. We also have a 2-year-old child together, so this has been making me even more anxious because it doesn’t just affect him—it affects our family and what I feel responsible for noticing or not ignoring. Another piece of context is that he has struggled with alcohol for a while. I don’t know all the details of what’s going on with his health, but I do wonder if he might feel embarrassed about it or avoid talking about it because of that. I’m not trying to judge him at all, just trying to understand why he’s shutting the conversation down so quickly. Now I feel stuck because I don’t know if I’m being paranoid or if I’m ignoring something that could actually be serious. I don’t want to nag him or damage our relationship over something that might be nothing, but at the same time I also feel guilty like I’d be ignoring a possible health issue.
On top of that, I’ve been really anxious about it and it’s made me start overthinking things. I’ve even had thoughts about going through his phone just to see if he’s googling symptoms or knows something he isn’t telling me, which I know isn’t a healthy thing to even consider, but the worry is kind of spiraling in my head.
I guess I just don’t know what the right thing to do is