u/EmployeeOnly9642

I wrote How to Be a Responsible Villain for people who were told we could change the world—and then grew up and discovered that becoming functional, self-aware adults might actually be the harder assignment.

It’s a darkly funny memoir about growing up in the 90s and 2000s with the Oregon Trail,, Nokia phones, bad relationships, big ambitions, trauma, faith, burnout, mental health, and the uncomfortable realization that sometimes the person screwing up your life is… you.

It’s ultimately about what happens when the life you thought you were supposed to have doesn’t materialize, and you have to figure out who you actually want to be instead.

If you like memoirs that mix dark humor, spirituality, psychology, religious deconstruction, and aggressive millennial nostalgia, you might like this one.

How to Be a Responsible Villain by Rowan Faris is available on Amazon:

https://a.co/d/05N16zXe

I asked her what she was passionate about. The answer is essentially: nothing.

I myself am a passionate person and always have been. I had a huge number or hobbies and clubs as a child and teenager, and still do.

My daughter draws, but usually only as a method of boredom reduction when she isn’t on Roblox. Which - we are extremely strict on screen time. 2 hours or less a day, one week a month none at all. Rare occasions like work events without childcare and sick days she (and her brother. Same problem - no passions or hobbies in life) can splurge on the Roblox.

I’ve tried forcing them into activities. I’ve tried following fleeting passions and trying to turn them into hobbies. They really truly seem to be just sitting around waiting until the next time they get to play Roblox and care about nothing else. It’s actually literally what they do most of the day between their hour post-chore post-homework screen time and their pre-reading and bedtime routine hour of screen time: wait dutifully until they can have screen time again.

I am so very sad.

Edit: wow. I considered taking this down because most of the responses were so unhelpful, but I decided to leave it up so you can see yourselves. Someone comes in here saying they’re struggling and seeking help, and you all attack? Do you talk to your children and spouses this way when they’re trying to problem solve, or just strangers on the internet because that’s easier? You are the people you’re trying to protect your own kids from, smh.

Thanks to the few responses that were kind and helpful. I’m taking away screens for the indefinite future and replacing it with daily trips to the library, as I absolutely love reading and want to focus on getting them into it, too. BTW, the AAP daily limit is 2 hours a day, which was the guidelines we were following. Doesn’t mean it “works”, which it clearly wasn’t, but man, seriously the way you’ve collectively approached this is not the way. Please take an honest look at your soul and what’s causing that meanness in you. Thanks.

I was recently offered a job at a large, prominent company in my community. The advertisement listed $60k base salary plus a house with valued rental of $40k/year. The housing is for if they hired out of state, which they didn’t, I was already here.

Because I didn’t need the house, they offered me a $85k base salary. I tried negotiating up to $90k, which would still give them a $10k cushion for rental management of the property I won’t be using. They did not agree to my counter and I said that was fine.

However, the problem came when they said that they’re not paying a tax (8%) that’s specific to my type of employment in my state. Most companies in this field pay that tax for the employee, this company apparently doesn’t. With the 8% tax added on, I will be making less there than my current job, and the new job is a lot more work.

I can’t keep my current job - I put in my notice in May already for reasons that I don’t feel it’s important to get into. I am, however, trying to decide whether I want to decline the offer from the new company and continue job searching or just take a season to stay at home with my kids, which I could technically do but it would be tight and a lot of pressure on my spouse.

Im genuinely excited about the opportunity but I don’t feel their actual offer matches the advertisement presented and I’m a bit sore about it. I also don’t want to do more work for less money. Any advice on what I should do here?