Mother's day
Mother's day is always a day that either nothing happens or there's a bunch of drama in my family. My first mother's day ever my sister tried to punch me in the face while we were out to eat bc I teased her about having a blonde moment.
My daughter is 11 now. I've never put much on mother's day because it's just the two of us and I don't want to be the one to tell her to do something for me, I want her to just decide that on her own. She doesn't ever do anything still, even though I've told her it hurts me that she can't even tell me happy mother's day and give me a hug. Or take 5 minutes to make me a card.
Yesterday, I took my daughter to an anime convention, spent over $200 on her for her favorite anime things. I wanted to see one thing there and she begged me to leave early because she didn't feel good, but was magically all better as soon as we left what I wanted to see. Before people come for me about putting my foot down, I would beg my mom to leave or to get food or other small things as a kid bc I felt sick, she never would and I would end up puking. I don't ever want my daughter to go through that.
I try so hard to be a good mom. Am I the best mom ever? No. I lose my patience easily sometimes and don't always have the energy to listen to her talk about a funny moment in a show. These aren't usual things, just sometimes I can't always be there 100%. I feel like my kid hates me though. I honestly don't even think she would care if I died. I just want one person to love me and even my own kid doesnt. I just don't know what I do to make her hate me and why I have no one.
Anyways happy mother's day to all that don't get the texts back from their families, who's kids are completely indifferent to them and have no one to celebrate them. I fucking hate this holiday.