Hi all, I'm new here so I hope something similar hasn't been asked a million times. I started seeing a needle therapist about 8 weeks ago. I go every-other week so I just had my 4th session. My first three sessions the therapist had me go over a timeline of my life and trauma. This last session the therapist said we were going to start working on some emdr and calming techniques.
Pertinent information: I left a high control religious group 5 years ago and have left religion - during a phone call prior to therapy I asked if they work with that kind of trauma to which they responded yes, they have experience in that realm. Also, I've not been diagnosed but I suspect I may be on the spectrum.
So they start asking me about things I'm proud of and try to get me to visualize. I had a really difficult time with this and sensed some frustration on the therapists part. I was getting frustrated, I didn't really know what the objective here was or how or what to do. They finally explained it's to have positive things to go back to when processing trauma - great but not helpful in the actual doing.
I glance over and see a Christian word sign (like something you'd pick up from hobby lobby) on their desk. My breath caught in my throat.
I left frustrated, hurting (both emotionally and physically), and so confused. Had I known this person was a Christian before starting therapy, I would have chosen to look elsewhere for therapy. That said, I don't want to be someone that writes off someone's professional skills because they're religious. But then again, I also don't trust or open up the most vulnerable parts of me with them either.
Was this a normal experience for just starting emdr, and something I just need to get through? Or do I need to maybe look elsewhere for a therapist with more experience/specialty?
Any advice appreciated - thank you all