Should I tell my friend?
Hey so I've been struggling with different themes of OCD like rocd with a previous partner, pocd (the worst), checking, rumination and everything else. I've been to therapy and I was taking medication for almost a year and then stopped. Anyways, I have this thing where if I say something behind someone's back (doesn't have to be negative) I have to confess it to them. Confession is one of my biggest compulsions. So I've been jealous of my friend who's very dear to me btw and they always treat me so well and they're so considerate and basically an angel in my eyes. I've been jealous of different things but I always kind of managed the emotions and moved on but recently they have started talking to this person whom I consider to be my person and It's freaking me out how much obsessed I have become. For a bit of context I gave my friend my other friend's number just for emergency contact but they became friends. The thing is , I wasn't obsessive like this in the past and especially not over stupid things. Oh they exchanged pictures of nature? I get that sinking feeling, oh they followed each other on insta? I just want to disappear They call each others "friends" ? Makes me full of anger. I literally cannot let go of anything. Also , I'm not blaming anyone at all and I love them and they have all the right to be friends because I don't have the right to control others and I do not want to!! I do not want to make this about me , I do not want them to stop talking, I do not want to be jealous, I do not want to be like this!!! I'm suffering from guilt and shame and urge to confess but also afraid of losing my friend. I've confessed to the person I'm jealous over but I feel like I'm talking behind my other friend's back and I can't live like a hypocrite. Should I tell them? Should I confess every single thing I've felt and said? Just tell me what's the right thing to do and I'll do it please