My mum triggers me often and I regret telling her about being abused
Long story short, I was sexually abused by my Dad in my teen years. My mum abused me too, but not in the same way, it was mainly emotional. My parents were divorced so my Mum was not physically there for the abuse.
I never told my mum until I was 21, and to be honest with you I am starting to regret it. I don't regret reaching out for help (and none of us ever should), but I kind of hate that she knows.
Its severly obvious my mum feels guilty about it, basically the reason I never came to her for help, is that basically any time I saw her she would yell at me and treat me like shit. However my mum is one of those parents that can never apologise.
Months ago, I met up with her, and out of nowhere she brings up my Dad sexually abusing me. We were literally in public getting lunch. She starts interrogating me, basically asking me "why didn't you tell me back then, why didn't you come to me for support?". So I just essentially tell her that I didn't feel able to because she would be horrible to me so often, but she couldn't accept that and kept making excuses.
She also triggers me by constantly bringing up her abuse, since I told her about being abused, she now randomly brings up being abused by her parents. Like how they used to hit her and other stuff. For example I was talking about having knee pain, and she brings up that she has knee issues because her parents used to hit her knees.
If its not obvious, she has bad mental health problems, and also suffers from PSTD from an abusive childhood. She was also abused by my Dad emotionally, financially, and he even threatened to r*pe her. I have quite literally begged her to get help, and she says she's just not ready and that I "couldn't possibly understand". I know you can't force someone to heal but genuinely her problems are damaging our relationship.
Does anyone else have a similar experience? My therapist has told me lots about enforcing boundaries with her and I do, but its difficult because she doesn't listen. I'm seeing her at the end of the month and I'm just genuinely worried about her triggering me again, I am seeing my bf after I see her just incase.