u/Evening_Cap1217

I always try to be nice to others and always take the wrong on my side. And when my friends talk to each other. They sounds like I am the main problem even though I did not even say anything. One person said that they disappointed at me for not saying anything, and then one who did not know the story was also blaming me for making that other person feel bad. Honestly, when I said something, they started blaming me as the one who is causing problem. And when I shut up, I am also the problem. Honestly, am I the problem for existing?
Please, tell me if I am the problem for not protecting myself from them. When I heard what they said I’m no longer depressed and cried like before. I just shut up and accepted let it slide. One even said good luck working with me to others. As if, my work is nothing. Honestly, how excellent you are. Please at least have some respect for others. If they are so much better than me. Lesson learnt: be blunt. Share your opinion, even if it is wrong.

But now, people just take on that fact and treating us like someone will less power. They say bad thing about us, treating us like someone who don’t deserve to be respect. And even worse, doing things that hurt our feeling. Yet we still forgive them because we know what it feels to be hate by others. Now that I grow up, I realized maybe bb is not only a mental problem. It is an eternal problem that can haunt every aspect of my life, from socializing, making friends to finding a job and making a living. Never once in my life I would say mean word or anything that belittle others. I always think about other feeling and effect of my action on others. But maybe i never could have known how selfish others are, they only remember what they for their benefits, and never once remember what we have helped them. Is this a lesson to tell me to live more for myself, or a lesson to be aware of life, or anything please just give me an idea.

What should I do if this is my first time after 4 years meeting my best friend again… i wonder if they still know that I have halitosis and will it gets bad as I go with them.

Recently I just realized how disadvantage I am to my friends, my colleague, everyone around me.
Because of bb, my confidence decreases, I start looking down on myself, my mental health degrades, I cannot be happy when Im with others. No longer can hold a conversation, or be nice with anyone because of bb. Gradually avoiding people, friends,… until they ignore me. Speak less, hide myself more, fidgeting. What worse is seeing people around me started looking down on me. Disrespecting me day by day, using abused words or even say unreal things about me or blaming me for everything I said or did. It is all because of my bad breath that people started disrespecting me.

Assume that you are trying your best not to smell bad, by brushing, eating and so on. But sometimes, you see people reaction and still unsure whether u still smell or not or worse, having fear of bb that u don’t dare to talk to anyone. This is how I am improving. I will classify my stage and current progress as 3 main stages:

About me: bb since 13, chronic, constant bad taste and bad breath that it smells bad and I can feel that it smell bad again after 10 mins of eating (society adaptation: level 0). Until im 20, I got my first tonsillectomy, chronic bad taste might gone. But intermittent bb is not, in the morning after I brushed, the metallic taste of toothbrush remain in my tongue for 1 hour more. Then when im hungry or tired or at the end of the day, my bb come back really bad that I can feel it (society adaptation: level 1). Seeing that physical intervention does not help, I opted for therapist (did not change bb except making me learn more about life and dare to adapt back to society adaptation: level 2). Then i go for psychiatry solution (downsides, I feel like I more likely to forget than before and cannot focus or think deeply). But I think im feeling happier (social adaptation: level 3) despite the fact that I am getting dumber I feel (so if anyone wants to talk and improve cognitive skill or critical thinking practice then just reach out).

Level 0: Don’t even dare to talk to anyone, not dare to stare at other, cant stop constantly fidgeting or drinking water when I get to crowded place. Cannot sit next to anyone. Keep on constantly leaving classroom and drink water till my breath smell like shit. Hold my breath walking pass other. Cry every time I go out, and hear people coughing though they don’t even mention my breath being bad. Don’t even dare to stand in line at anywhere ( or if I really have to then I have to ask my dad to do it for me, or just hold my breath until death. Now that I think of it, if others look at me that time they just thought i’m so weird, I keep distancing and moving away from people whether they cough or not). And I am also worried that when I eat, others might feel uncomfortable about my food smell. And when in class, I talked with my mouth covered. My teacher then asked me a question, but idk why I am feeling so bad that I don’t even talk (fear of bb) and the downfall of my emotion and wonder what can I do with this bb forever kick in which makes me broke down in tear in the middle of the class. I even think I smell bad from nose, and every cough or weird sounds => makes me cry after I get home. I don’t even dare to have dinner with my mom. Family event, I hide. Family trip which we travel by car, I would lie down to take a whole 3 seats so no one will sit next to me. Then I take a blanket and cover my whole face and fake sleeping (crying internally).

Level 1: learn my lesson, i cannot guess what people are really thinking about me. I know that but I cant change. However, I dare to social but with a mask. And whenever I have to talk or approach anyone, I would act like a robot and keep a gap between me and them. My mom (whom I tell about my bb fear) comments that it looks like i keep on avoiding everyone that is why ppl look like they are avoiding or moving away from me. I know but I cannot change. I keep on having that first thought (my breath smell bad) whenever I encounter anyone. Would not dare to talk for too long. Or dare to go to crowded place (cinema, concert, crowded place really haunted me). I only dare to go to meet people that can sit faraway from me. Still cry at night but feeling much better than Lvl 0 as bad taste comes and goes. Though I still sit alone i class or leave early or fidget if anyone sit opposite to me.

Level 2: still not improving much, but talking to therapists really expand my mindset. I realized that I have been too fixated on myself and actually no one would think of me as someone who have bb when they first see me the way I think I am. Then I started going to supermarket or buying stuff myself, engaging more. Can sit with other but not for too long, I could not be able to endure it. Try to go on family trip but still cover my face with blanket so when ppl cough I would assume it is not my smell. No hold my breath walking past other.

Level 3: the thought of having bb when I met other gradually go away as times goes by. i think it is because of the medicine. But at the same time, my mind is not as active as it used to. But now, I dare to go into crowded place, talk to strangers, or even buying cinema ticket or sit in a theatre for as long as I want. What I realized is, I care less about people coughing and sneezing. I can join family trip, still feel good if ppl are not sitting by me. But I can join my university event and festival or even have meal with my teacher. And not really fidgeting or moving away from others when I meet them. That’s so much of a breakthrough for me. However, i wont say that I dont have bb because I can still smell it occasionally, but it wont make me as depressed as I used to.

This is just my own experience, and doesn’t assume it is applied to you as well. But one lesson I learnt and I desperately want you to know is. Even if I meet you today, you think you have bad breath and keep on anxious. Then tbh, the only thing I can see is someone acting weird and anxious to me, then I guess something might be wrong with me which makes me hyperaware of myself as well. Therefore, it is not other fault for not understanding you. And not your fault for misunderstanding them. U just have different perception to them (I used to as well).

I am really disappointed in myself, i know I always act naive and stubborn because of bb. I hide myself from talking to other people and always act naive and stubborn so they ask to investigate any further. But now, because of this, I was getting bullied by my friend whom I know for so long. They used mean words that suppose to hurt my feeling, I have been hurt mentally and crying for the last 2 days when seeing them. I really dont know how I can live anymore. We used to be good buddy until we meet new friend that totally change their personality. I recalled helping them out when they were busy with their task. But now, they decided to turn me in to my teacher. Why life is always so bad like this? I wanna cry so bad, been sitting in the bathroom with tears falling down.

My bb is not decreasing or increasing idk if it is still the bb that hindered me but im try to be happy with life and try to join in with ppl. But why did everybody keeps on giving me a blank face and bold attitude.

I keep on acting strange like putting hand over my mouth. Or trying to move a little bit away from them. Sometimes I am still anxious having strangers sitting next to me. Please help.

Chào mọi người, đây là lần đầu e đi máy bay một mình. E chuẩn bị có bay chuyến nội địa nhưng e có việc bận nên e tính là từ chợ Bến Thành lúc 3h30 bắt xe qua sân bay là làm thủ tục cho chuyến bay 17:30 thì có kịp ko ạ? E ko mang hành lý ký gửi, mua vé trên Traveloka thì có cần cân nhắc trước gì k ạ? E nghe nói sân bay xếp hàng làm thủ tục lâu lắm, không biết đến sân bay 1 tiếng rưỡi trước giờ bay có trễ bay k ạ? Mn cho e xin kn đi máy bay cho nhanh và kịp giờ bay ạ… Cảm ơn mn.

My mucus dripping from the back of my throat is salty but it does not stank. However at night, after I brushed my teeth and go to bed. It suddenly have a weird mucus dripping down taste. and the mucus smell bad as I spit it out on my hand and sniff it while my saliva has no smell.

Please help me fix it.

If I dont have bb and talk comfortably with other, I swear everything would have been different.

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I barely maintain a lengthy conversation with others, I dont know what can I do for work? I have never applied for a job or even thinking of going for an interview. I feel like giving up in life, though ppl around me treat me fairly good. They dont say that I stank or anything but internally, I feel like I DO. I gradually refuse to live, withdraw myself from social interaction and then what, my brain rotted. Fuck I cant even open my mouth. Im a failure fucking failure cant do shit.

My tonsils have been removed, I’m really getting better with my breath than before since when I got bad taste all the times. However, i thought everything has gone. Still when I have to meet others or close my mouth for a period of time. It’s gone bad. It smell like the hot breath that have been there for years. Please help me with that.

It really changed my breath from having chronic bas taste, my mouth now can feel free of it.