I hate my life
My life is genuinely never going to get better I’m a senior in high school and Iv never got to experience high school like other people . I never partyed Iv never done drug or ever been in love with someone. What’s worse is that I have a sibling who has everything I want except he’s a boy and I’m a girl. He gets to go wherever he wants, be home late, hangout with girls and what not and I. Can’t do anything that’s a sin. I have no job, like 2 friends. It’s end of senior year and Iv literally done nothing like I have no life. No one ever calls me to do anything or even thibks about me. I just don’t understand cause everybody says that I’m fun to be around and nice but no one actually wants me. I just want to die but not like kms like nothing bad happens to me and I die like getting ran over while crossing the road or like in my sleep so I don’t have to wake up. It’s been like this since 6th grade like my life never gets better and if anything I’m always reminds how little my life matter and how I amount to nothing . I have no one to talk to about this. I hate how life doesn’t even matter so it’s like why do I event try. I hate when my family gets mad at me for thing an and just tells me how horrible my life is and that I’m wasting it on doing nothing. I just want to die. I hate how I cant talk about how religion made me so oppressed and how iv self harmed and even tried to overdose before. Like iv also been s’as multiple times and i hate how everyone to choose what happens to my body except for me. Like thats the whole joke of my life someonelse saying how I should live it and i know i could loose everything if i dont listen to. I have so much religious trauma and i just feel trapped, i can never become who i want to be without sacrificing parts of my current life . I just want to die .