how to stop hurting over a break up
This was a breakup I expected because we had talked about it multiple times before, but it still hurts now that it’s actually happened. He cut contact because he felt like he wasn’t deserving of our relationship and wanted to focus on himself. We were together for more than 3 years, and his family was so welcoming. I truly loved him and the life we shared.
I keep putting myself in his shoes, wondering how he’s feeling and whether he’s okay. I still find myself trying to check on him, even though I’m removed everywhere and his accounts are private. What makes it even harder is that he was genuinely a great guy, we just couldn’t see eye to eye on certain values.
I keep replaying the past in my head, thinking about when things felt lighter and happier. Maybe that’s what makes letting go so painful. If I move on, it’ll never be him; if I wait, it’ll never be me.
I know he was in pain during our relationship because although the love we had was very real, we were incompatible in certain ways. That’s why a part of me wants to officially let go, for him to be happy even if it’s without me.
At the same time, I feel so conflicted within myself. I want to rush the healing process so I can stop hurting, yet I’m scared to heal because it makes everything feel final, like it really is over. I’m also afraid of moving on because he was such a huge part of my life for so long. For years, he felt like my everything.
Please give me advice on how I can distract myself and stop going back and forth in my head like this.