u/Expert_Atmosphere_70

So... i just lost my cool with a regular customer who has been a thorn in my side for a couple of years. Always nit picking, being condescending and complaining about things that are not my fault,calling me incompetent to colleagues and generally just being a twat.

We usually communicate by email but today he came in and had a go at me to my face and then ...the rage appeared.

It was physical, i felt a rising heat burning at my feet up my whole body and when it got to my head it felt like it was going to burst from pressure.

I've NEVER felt anything like it.

It felt like it must've looked cartoonish, with my body turning red and steam coming out my ears. It was so visceral, it actually scared me.

Thankfully i didn't say or do anything very bad, I stalked after him and said I'd had enough of him always having a go at me. He just mumbled something and walked off, maybe i looked terrifying..

I almost burst into tears but thankfully didn't. My heart was racing though and I still feel too hot.

Part of me is thankful that i can still feel strongly - anhedonia and all that has been my standard for 2 years now,but yikes i don't ever want to feel that again.

The unending repetition of house work, yard work, laundry, shopping,cooking, cleaning. I don't care anymore, its all so stupid.

Everything needs redoing days later. And for what? ??

I've done no research on this but I'm convinced these standards of house and garden were set at a time when people had servants if not actual slaves, not just a woman at home all day.

But even if I ignore it for today, it will eat away at me every time i look or walk past it. Anxiety, guilt, resentment.

Or I can choose to spend the day out doing something in nature, or something fun. Wrangling the kids and husband where they'll possibly whinge or bicker. I'll spend ages trying to decide where, when, how. We'll drive somewhere and end up spending money we don't have. And we will see some nice nature or do something then go home and feel the same. Whats the point of that??

Or I go by myself and avoid that, then feel lonely or guilty they're not there. Or just bored.

Where's my joy gone? Why has my joy gone?? Whats the point of our bodies doing this to us???

I tried HRT it didn't help with this. I tried Ssris it didn't help. I'm on Adrofemme and BC. I'm 45, and I can feel life slipping away. I feel nothing except dissatisfaction with absolutely everything. But I don't know how to help myself.

I started Androfemme 3 weeks ago, and could almost cry with relief as I can start to feel myself returning.

For 3 years (am 45) I've been a shell, i stopped my hobbies and had zero drive or motivation to do anything above the bare minimum.

After just 2 weeks on testosterone cream, I could feel a very small gradual lift. Nothing huge, but i wanted to do things so I did them. I did the things. I didnt lie in bed hoping they would disappear.

If you know this feeling you understand how momentous this is!!

I'm not back 100% or even close, but its given me so much hope.

I just randomly blurted out to my dr at the tail end of a visit , and asked if he would prescribe it 'for low libido'. He immediately said yes.

I'd been seeing him for 3 years about my symptoms, we'd gone through ssris and testing of all sorts. Never offered hrt.

It really sucks that libido was the thing that made this happen but at this point i don't care.

And yes, it has helped with libido also, again nothing dramatic but noticeable.

Good luck out there ladies xx

I started Androfemme 3 weeks ago, and could almost cry with relief as I can start to feel myself returning.

For 3 years (am 45) I've been a shell, i stopped my hobbies and had zero drive or motivation to do anything above the bare minimum.

After just 2 weeks on testosterone cream, I could feel a very small gradual lift. Nothing huge, but i wanted to do things so I did them. I did the things. I didnt lie in bed hoping they would disappear.

If you know this feeling you understand how momentous this is!!

I'm not back 100% or even close, but its given me so much hope.

I just randomly blurted out to my dr at the tail end of a visit , and asked if he would prescribe it 'for low libido'. He immediately said yes.

I'd been seeing him for 3 years about my symptoms, we'd gone through ssris and testing of all sorts. Never offered hrt.

It really sucks that libido was the thing that made this happen but at this point i don't care.

And yes, it has helped with libido also, again nothing dramatic but noticeable.

Good luck out there ladies xx

Hi. I'm 45.

I've been experiencing personality changes, and energy and performance decrease issues for 3 years and have gone down every health and testing rabbit hole with almost nothing to show for it, except lots of reports and a lighter wallet.

However I always find similar stories from peri groups so am always drawn back here but other than 'Hormones ' I'm not really finding much evidence or explanation for what causes it all.

The adhd link especially gets me hooked, as i relate alot to adhd content however I know thats kinda the problem as its relatable to alot of people without adhd diagnosis. I know its the effect and severity thats key, not just the presence.

My rambling question is, has anyone suspected they had adhd as an adult in peri and gone down the diagnosis route only to be told they don't have it?

What happened, what did you do next? Were you satisfied with the diagnosis (or lack of) ?

Alternatively, did you get diagnosed and start treatment, and did it help with some of these things?

Adult onset -crushing unexplained fatigue, loss of joy, loss of motivation, insomnia, anhedonia, loss of libido, 3am wake ups, anxiety, ruminating thoughts, memory issues, abandoning hobbies, lethargy, socially withdrawing, fear of death, depression, total and sudden change in clothing style preferences, disinterest in previous interests, inability and disinterest in cleaning and general upkeep , inability to start projects, researching things obsessively but never doing them, doom scrolling, over eating, snacking

I