About three weeks ago I had a photo shoot outside and something bit me at first I thought it was a mosquito bite. But it won’t go away. Note: im 36 weeks pregnant. It’s extremely itchy and it got bigger that it initially was and now there’s like tiny bumps around it
Before I had my daughter my relationship with my in laws was okay. I took initiative of trying to form a relationship with them invited them to family vacations would host Xmas dinners actually my husband said it’s the one time him and his entire family ever sat down together and have dinner at the same table.
Its mother is very passive aggressive and makes insufferable comments before my daughter I was able to ignore them.
After I had my daughter she’s say things like “
“motherhood will be easy you don’t work”
“You can be up at night with the baby you don’t have to wake up for work”
“Give the baby formula so I can feed her”
“When can I give her a bathe, change her diaper, baby sit her”
“When she has her shots I’ll be over everyday to play with her”
“She has to come to my Xmas party, it’s okay if she gets sick she’ll get over it”
“My baby”
“I know you don’t like when I hold her this way but this is how I’m comfortable she’s a baby she doesn’t know how she wants to be held”
“She looks nothing like you”
“When will you go back to work so I can babysit”
“Why can’t I do the things your mom does for you and the baby”
“Well she’s my grand daughter, I want to do all the same things my sister does for her grandkids”
“Why’d you swaddle her when I first meet her does she have all her fingers and toes”
“I don’t have to wash my hands before I hold her my hands are clean”
“She can come over your dad is sick but he won’t hold her”
“Ppl around me are sick, I’m not sick”
“I’ll lie to you when anyone is sick or I travel out of state so I can see her how will you know”
Please tell me these stupid comments would bother you as a new mom because my baby is about to be 1 and I’m planning to have her and fil invited but I hate them so much. As a new mom I questioned myself a lot which I’m sure everyone does but her comments made it so much harder I thought I was going to be a bad mom one comment in particular she made, my husband was up in the morning bottle feeding while I was getting some rest couple days pp because I was up every two hours during the night breastfeeding and she said “well that’s your wife she’s a late sleeper. Telling her son “you should be able to rest too not just her.
My husband actually does not want to invite them to her birthday because he feels like I’ll be stressed over his mom making dumb comments about me and the baby. For reference I’ve been NC and then haven’t seen baby since she was 8 weeks old.
Every time I had to see them it made me overly anxious and stressed so I decided to removed myself entirely. My therapist said as my daughter gets older she will ask about them so I should include them in birthdays, graduations etc but they don’t have to be apart of her daily circle as they aren’t safe adults for a child.
MIL hasn’t seen my baby since she was 8 weeks old (she’s 10 months old) because she’s lied about being sick, going to big events during cold and flu season and expecting to see baby after. Wanted to pass her around at her Xmas party with all her family members before she was vaccinated. Made nasty comments to me freshly pp.
I’ve since gone no contact because they just don’t understand basic hygiene like washing their hands before holding her the day they visited at the hospital. The list goes on.
She texted my husband this weekend saying they’re having a bbq with family coming from out of state and if he can find some time to sneak baby away for a quick visit. My husband didn’t respond which I wish he would just say your sneaky actions is exactly why you don’t see baby and that will never happen unless you apologize to me and my wife for your behavior in the past. What would you do in the situation. I’m no contact with her
I’ve gone no contact with my mil since my first born was 8 weeks old. She’s made nasty comments towards me treated me badly when I was pregnant and after baby got here wanted full access to my baby. For the first couple of weeks I let visit happen but they were so bad I basically would have to beg them to wash their hands before holding her. They’d lie if they were sick and still try to visit baby. Because it was just a cold (not covid).
If you look at my post history you’ll see how upsetting and frustration she was to me as a new mother. Which is why I decided to go no contact.
Today I’m 20 weeks pregnant with my second baby. No one know about it expect my husband and my side of the family. I don’t plan on telling his family till the baby gets here.
When my first born got here my husband sent his mother endless photos and she was at a party a week later showing babies photo to everyone when I asked her not to. I don’t share babys photo online but after giving birth I wasn’t comfortable having her photo shown to a bunch of strangers at just a week old. When my husband confronted her about it she lied and she didn’t show anyone photos but ppl at the party called and told me she was doing so.
With the new baby on the way I kindly asked my husband to not share photos of her especially to his mother. I know it’s his baby too but I’ve given his mother chance after chance and they’ve just proven to be ppl who will cross our boundaries and go about their day thinking they should still see our children.
Do you guys think this is a hard thing I’ve asked of my husband?
Days before Mother’s Day my husband confronted his mother telling her reasons she doesn’t see LO. After the visit as he was leaving she says to him “well I hope your bringing her to see me for Mother’s Day since it’s my first one as a grandmother I’ve invited all my family over for a brunch and figured that would be a good time for her to meet everyone”. Mind you she hasn’t seen LO since she was 8 weeks old she’s almost 9 months old. She’s so entitled to my daughter and so selfish. It was my first Mother’s Day she disregarded me and made it all about her. Even thought my husband has gone low contact and told her that she keeps crossing boundaries and she will never get to see LO if she can’t follow our boundaries she still thinks my husband will make an appearance on Mother’s Day.
When we got married on Mother’s Day I would have to ask my husband to go over to see her or even get her a gift which he would do. Since she’s been nasty to me ever since I had my baby I don’t care to celebrate her for Mother’s Day and my husband didn’t bother getting her anything or went over to see her.
He told me that he’s honestly exhausted trying to deal with his mother and he’s okay with just avoiding them and focusing on his family. He said he feels a huge weight lifted after he told them off and now it’s their turn to do what they’d like with that information.
So she had her Mother’s Day brunch thinking we’d show up because she’s entitled and looked like a complete fool infront of her family. She needs some serious help
After eight long months of telling my husband he needs to talk to his mom he finally did it.
Husband told her she needs to stop making nasty comments towards me about not working it was our decision we made as a family for me to stay home with our daughter and it’s none of her business.
Her response: “ I didn’t know that upset you guys”
Him: when you go out of state you can’t come visit my daughter after. When family members that are visiting from out the country she’s not coming over. Stop asking me constantly when I already said no.
Her: okay I’ll just lie when I go out of state. How wil you find out? Did she get all her shots I don’t get the big deal.
Husband: “you always give us a hard time about washing your hands”
Her: But I do it anyways. Everyone else sees their grand daughter and gets to babysit their granddaughter why is it so hard for me to see mine.
Husband: you acted crazy at our baby shower and helped us with nothing.
Her: I didn’t know I did anything wrong.
So he comes home and tells me his mom was unapologetic did not say sorry but she wants to call me to apologize. No she wants to call me to tell me she didn’t know she did anything wrong and cry that she needs to see her grand baby. My husband accidentally shipped some items to his moms house which he picked up when he was there she proceeded to ask him did you send this here as a tactic to get to see me and bring the baby 😂😂.
She thinks that he sent the items there so he can use it as a excuse to tell me his wife oh I have to go pick up this stuff and bring the baby along so she can see baby. Only a crazy person would make up something like that in their head because the baby didn’t go with him. She thinks I’m keeping the baby and my husband from her.
I’ve long ago blocked her and she told him when he left she’d call me. I’ll never unblock her because once I tried talking to her and she never admitted she was wrong or ever said sorry to me. I tried multiple times.
The fact that she could say to my husband I’ll just lie and still come see the baby proves to me that she doesn’t care about the well being of my daughter and I’ve honestly lost sleep over it because how could someone be so ignorant and selfish. My daughter was born during cold and flu season and they never respected any boundaries so I cut them off. Now I feel a bit more at peace that I did the right thing because I trusted my gut and I was right. As a mother I don’t want any type of lying, manipulated things going on around my child. And now I’m definitely certain I made the right decision by keeping them away.
My mom called me to tell me mil called her crying that I don’t let her see grand baby. My mom basically laid it on her and told her all the reasons why I went no contact (my mom asked my permission before she did this) I posted on here before about my justnomil. When my mom told her about the way she acted at the baby shower and didn’t help with anything she said I did help and my mom was like “no you didn’t” she had nothing to say.
Mom told her how she insulted me freshly pp saying “oh it’s easy for you to wake up with baby you don’t work” she said oh yea I said that but didn’t mean it that way. Saying how she says things but she doesn’t mean it. lol
Mom told her why would my daughter want to be around ppl that insult her all the time. She’s been through a lot and she finally has her baby and she wants to enjoy her.
The conversation ended, my mom told her there’s nothing I can do for you. My daughter and her husband are adults they make the decisions when it comes to their baby so talk to your son.
The reason she called my mom was because she thinks I’m the issue and her son is an innocent by stander with no say. When it was her son that wanted to go low/no contact because he said his mother won’t listen and always has to have the last word and won’t respect what he has to say.
This changes nothing on my end she’s still not seeing my daughter lol