I (23M) met this girl in one of my lectures at the start of the semester. I had noticed her once before and liked her instantly, but I didn’t have the confidence to just go up and talk to her.
A couple weeks later, we ended up in the same group for a class activity. She was sitting right in front of me, and the way she looked at me didn’t feel random. We started talking, I cracked jokes, she laughed a lot, and even though the rest of the group was giving us weird looks, I didn’t care.
Later that day, she sent me a follow request on Instagram. We started chatting, and that same night we met up to smoke. It was freezing cold, and she was on antibiotics—at one point she almost passed out. I helped her warm up, made sure she was okay, and walked her home.
After a few more days of talking, we planned to drink wine and watch a movie at my place. Things escalated, and we ended up having sex. It was a good night. I dropped her home, she made me coffee, and before I left she kissed me again—it felt kind of final, but I didn’t think too much of it then.
After that, things went cold. When I asked her to meet again, she said we shouldn’t do anything anymore.
We didn’t really talk properly after that until the end of the semester. Then suddenly she started opening up again, telling me about another guy she’s talking to—someone her family knows, but he’s in a different country. She said she feels comfortable telling me because I’m a “safe space” and good at keeping secrets.
After exams, we started interacting again. One day she asked me to go for a walk near my place, came over “just to drink water,” and it honestly felt like she expected me to make a move. But I didn’t. I stayed completely neutral, didn’t escalate anything, and she left pretty quickly.
Later, she started texting me in a flirty way and straight up told me to initiate things next time.
So I did. I invited her over, she came, we hooked up again… and right after, she said, “this was the last time.”
And now I’m just sitting here wondering—what even is this?
Is she confused? Is she just using me when she feels like it? Why say “last time” every time and then come back again?
Genuinely want to know what women think of this situation.
ps: I thought I could understand women, but I can never 👎