I am not sure if I was assaulted yesterday or if I imagined it. It makes me question my sanity and I worry people will think I am a psycho.
I was partying with a new group of friends, alcohol involved.
It was all good till the moment we were about to leave.
I was in front of the big mirror in bar's hallway and there was a man behind me. He started touching and groping me. At the beginning I did nothing and just stared at the mirror but then I suddenly hit the mirror and tried to punch the guy behind me. I started screaming and raging.
My friends came to calm me down, and told me nothing is happening, I am safe and to calm down.
I was swearing to them that I was touched by a guy and I am scared and that I did not imagine it.
But now today I a started questioning if maybe I imagined it, that something like this would not happen, that someone would notice I was molested in bright light in public space. It does not make sense in my brain.
I had a situation in the past, when I also did not fully remember what happened. Police was involved and many of my claims turned out to be true based on the recordings from CCTV, but not everything was visible and I started filling gaps with some details that did not actually happened. After that I have a hard time trusting myself and my memories.
One part of me feels that I would not react this strong to something that did not happen, especially when I was not in the aggressive mood whole night. Second part questions my sanity, that maybe I was tired and drunk and imagined someone behind me when there was noone.
I feel so ashamed, I am worried people will think I am some self-centred psycho that imagines that everyone wants to assault them and make up stories.
Is it possible to imagine something like that?