u/FabulousLeading5245

*North Carolina*

Hello. I am up for recertification and am doing it by mail.

As of right now, my child's father is not on court-ordered child support but does send money when he can due to the nature of his job. It's not frequent and he can go several months without sending anything. But he does when he is able to.

I'm assuming when he does to just call my caseworker and tell them that I received a payment from him for that month? But I want to correctly report this on my on my application. I have called and emailed my caseworker multiple times to ask, but received no response. Thanks in advance.

I'm genuinely lost right now.

I want to give up so much right now.

I don't feel the things I see other happy Christians talk about.

I'm depressed, lonely, always struggling financially. I can't seem to be ok for too long.

I've prayed. Read scripture. Talked to God. All the things that everyone says you are supposed to do. I can't drive, so I'm not able to get to church.

I feel like "what's the point?" That's where I'm at.

I've been a believer for 35 years (my entire life) and I feel like I'm unheard by God.

The thing is, I don't want to give up. But I'm tired. Exhausted.

I have a two year old. Single parent. He's my motivation to keep going. To keep believing. But I'm on a thin thread.

This was mostly a rant. Asking for prayers and maybe to hear testimonies of those who how I'm feeling.