why do i do this to myself
during sex i always let things happen to me i dont want but last night was the worst. it was my boyfriends birthday and i wanted to give him good birthday sex so i put on the lingerie and shaved etc. things were going well and i was doing all the things he absolutely loves that i dont do often, then me bends me over and asks to put it in my ass. to which i said no like three times then he kept begging so i just said yes. he asked if i said yes just because he begged and i said yes. he asked something else but i just remember it being something along the lines of he knew he shouldnt do this but hes going to anyways. anyways he ends up fucking my ass and at one point it started hurting but i couldnt say stop and he wasnt slowing down. at least i had enough courage to tell him he couldnt cum in there but all i feel now is violated even though i said yes.
anybody know how to feel better rn? does anybody else do this shit to themselves?