u/Fair_Lock_7630

Image 1 — Tips for a lonely Ragdoll boy?
Image 2 — Tips for a lonely Ragdoll boy?
Image 3 — Tips for a lonely Ragdoll boy?
▲ 111 r/ragdolls

Tips for a lonely Ragdoll boy?

Hello! I'm quite new here but I'm looking for people with similar kitties who may be able to shine some light on my situation.

I have a raggie boy, who I rescued as he was dumped. I don't really know his history, but it is suspected that he was hit on the head as he has damage to his brain. He also is partially sighted, but overall he is usually very happy and chirpy. He also has IBD and balance issues when climbing (basically he cant climb well, lol). We approximate that he is about 6-7 years old.

When I first got him, we thought he was about a year old, he was incredibly playful, and used to run around like a lunatic. He eventually settled down a bit but still loved a good play and zoomies session frequently.

Lately though I've noticed some distinct behavioural changes since I moved house to live on my own and changed jobs. And looking back, I think it's slowly been happening for a while. I've had him checked by the vets and we're all in agreement that his current health conditions are under control, including his pain levels. I also walk him every evening and let him choose the route. They are not concerned about anything medical.

My issue is this:

It is getting harder to get him interested in playing, and he is less excited about food. Initially I thought perhaps it was him getting older, but he's by no means geriatric. I have tried lots of different colours, types, textures of toys and different ways of playing. I've tried stronger/better catnip sprays and toys but they often give him a very short lived moment of play before he lays down again. But most days he doesnt want to play at all.

He just seems... Depressed?

We have recently moved out of a house with multiple people, at least one of which was always home, and before that he lived with me and my ex who worked from home and another cat. I am also currently working 4 x 10 hr days, commuting for 1.5hrs each way, so I am not at home for most of the day. My previous job gave me a lot more time with him.

Anyway, adding everything up, the vet has suggested, and I am feeling perhaps it adds up, that he may be lonely. I am curious to see if anybody has suggestions as to how I can help him with this? He is very clingy to me anyway and always has been, but lately I feel as well that I can't go into the other room without him being actively stressed about it.

I am considering another kitten but I absolutely do not want to make the decision lightly.

My main anxiety is getting another cat. He is a very friendly cat, but due to his unusual neurology, he lacks... Kitty social skills. Most cats freak out at him because he maintains this really intense eye contact and approaches to try and sniff their face immediately. Almost every cat he tried to approach runs away or hisses. He always looks so disappointed... His little tail droops and he lets out this pathetic little mewl.

There was one cat at our previous house who was just very calm and quiet with him, and the two became very good friends. This black cat would meet us out on our walks, and eventually found our garden and used to come calling for him. It was really sweet.

My biggest question is... Would another ragdoll cat be the best bet? I'd love to get an older cat but I think it may be harder to bond him with an older cat. A kitten may be easier? I have heard some people say Ragdolls are different from other cats, so perhaps another Raggie might be better for him to interact with? What have your experiences been with multi ragdoll households, and do they differ to other cats?

He's my first Raggie boy so I am learning a lot! Thank you so much.

u/Fair_Lock_7630 — 1 day ago

WIBTA if my Mom looked after my cat in my house?

Hello,

I've lurked a lot but never really posted.

I am auDHD, so I struggle a lot with social situations. I feel like I am maybe in the wrong here but I can't figure out why.

For a bit of context, my current housemate and I moved in together a yr ago. I informed her of my cat, his medical conditions and his medications.

We have been friends for 8 years.

My cats needs are as follows:

Morning and evening meal and two tiny tablets, which he happily takes wrapped in some meat.

Litter clean outs. I do a full clean twice a week, clean faeces immediately & clear any wees when I get up, before I leave for work, when I get home and right before bed.

I do not ask my roommate to do any of this.

Thing is, when I go away my parents usually take my cat and he stays at their house as he loves it there.

There was one situation a few months ago where I got stranded several miles away. I asked my housemate if she could just pop some food down for him. She didn't respond. In fact, she gave me the silent treatment for 24 hours. I had no idea if he'd even been fed.

When we talked she just said how she felt "used" and how he isn't her responsibility.

My cat cannot be vaccinated due to autoimmune disease so catteries will not take him.

My current issue, is this:

My parents recently rescued a little cat. We plan on gently introducing them but we only have a week to do so. And I am certain that's not long enough.

My Mom suggested she would drop in to care for him in my home.

My roommates reply to my suggestion of this was:

  1. She was expecting both me and my cat to be out of the house and has therefore mentally prepared for this

- I proposed to book somewhere cat friendly to give her alone time to make up for it. She declined because it wouldn't be "the same days".

  1. She was not super comfortable with my Mom coming in and out and staying overnight.

- I totally understand this, and did not argue.

  1. She said she has spent her whole life thinking about others and now she wants to think about herself.

- I didn't really know how to respond to this. But I feel this is unfair. I have not asked her to do anything for me except that one time. In fact, I took her to hospital and stayed with her for 12 hours overnight when she thought she was having a heart attack. She has done nothing like that for me. She runs me to and from our riding yard but she is going there anyway and I pay her fuel for this. She is always having friends round every week and I have nobody. She calls me her friend but includes me in nothing. She even brought round two people we had both been friends with for years but they ignored me completely, went into her room and shut her door away from me.

Of course if I have no options I will stay at home with my cat.

But am I being unreasonable in my attempts at compromise? Is there something I am not seeing?

Please help me. If I am TA, then I want to know how and why so that I can do the right thing. Please be kind.

Thank you.

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u/Fair_Lock_7630 — 3 months ago