u/Familiar_Day_5735

here are a couple of things I learned that you guys can take away from as well since I am about to break my 1 day fast.

1. I will no longer be part of the church of christ denomination (might have to rethink about catholicism/orthodoxy)
2. The difference of fasting and abstinence of food (I did realise this poorly and next time I will fast with intention)
3. The abstaining from lust and appetite through the power of prayer and not just "tricks" such as distracting yourself with water, phone, etc.

I will be doing better on my next fast. I am open to doing 7 day fasts! please give me your insights!

Currently in the RCW SF...I was interrogated last night for essentially wanting to be catholic again (long story short: I had explored theology and church history leading me to question the church.) One of my "co-disciplers" told me that we were going to meet up outside after service with the church leader (I didn't even knew there were going to interrogate me.) I was eventually surrounded by 5 people including the church leader and told me what I was doing was unbiblical that I shouldn't be exploring church history and theology anymore and that I should have a "personal relationship" with reading and interpreting the scriptures and that my salvation was at risk. They told me that I should go back to doing "real biblical christianity" and everybody outside the church isn't save: protestant, catholic, orthodox, anything you name it. But for some reason if you aren't a "disicple" according to their doctrine you aren't saved.

I felt like I was ganged up in a sense and I wasn't allowed to believe anything aside from what their view of the bible meant. funny thing...the "evangelist" who was talking to me said that he needs to work on his evangelism. funny how they say that they wanted to talk to me because they "cared" about me like a "brother and the 2 people who reported me for my "lack of respect" for the church DIDN'T EVEN DO ANYTHING TO HELP AFTER THE CONVERSATION and went on an "e-date" the next tomorrow morning.

one thing I hate the most are hypocrites. I felt like my dignity was taken away from me. why did they have to secretly talk behind my back. why did they have to interrogate me like this. why did you guys have to put all this pressure on me. why did you make me feel this way? I freaking lived with 6 of you guys and everything now is just akward. pls someone help me leave this organization.

Currently in the RCW SF...I was interrogated last night for essentially wanting to be catholic again (long story short: I had explored theology and church history leading me to question the church.) One of my "co-disciplers" told me that we were going to meet up outside after service with the church leader (I didn't even knew there were going to interrogate me.) I was eventually surrounded by 5 people including the church leader and told me what I was doing was unbiblical that I shouldn't be exploring church history and theology anymore and that I should have a "personal relationship" with reading and interpreting the scriptures and that my salvation was at risk. They told me that I should go back to doing "real biblical christianity" and everybody outside the church isn't save: protestant, catholic, orthodox, anything you name it. But for some reason if you aren't a "disicple" according to their doctrine you aren't saved.

I felt like I was ganged up in a sense and I wasn't allowed to believe anything aside from what their view of the bible meant. funny thing...the "evangelist" who was talking to me said that he needs to work on his evangelism. funny how they say that they wanted to talk to me because they "cared" about me like a "brother and the 2 people who reported me for my "lack of respect" for the church DIDN'T EVEN DO ANYTHING TO HELP AFTER THE CONVERSATION and went on an "e-date" the next tomorrow morning.

one thing I hate the most are hypocrites. I felt like my dignity was taken away from me. why did they have to secretly talk behind my back. why did they have to interrogate me like this. why did you guys have to put all this pressure on me. why did you make me feel this way? I freaking lived with 6 of you guys and everything now is just akward. pls someone help me leave this organization.

I hate it. self loath is an inevitable stage. getting back to confessing has been the single most powerful thing that lead me to 24 days. I've been struggling with just life's challenges and how I use porn to escape that. I'm a really "hustle" type of person so each time I reach a new level a new demon has to approach. a new lustful breed comes in and repeats the pattern over again and this time it gets worse and worse since the stress gets high and high because of the risks im taking as an entrepreneur. would love some advice.