AIO for not wanting to be friends with a long term friend anymore…?
Long story short I have been friends with this girl since fifth grade (14 years). She had moved out of state and ended up in a domestic violent relationship with her infant. Back in October I offered to let her come live with me back in our home state since I had an extra bedroom and I’m a caring person and we’ve been friends for awhile. We also grew up in foster care as well for a good chunk of our childhood/teenage years so idk I felt really bad for the situation that she was in. At first everything was fine she always picked up after herself and her baby, would help with extra chores around the house since I was letting her stay with me for free, etc. It took her FOREVER to find a job since she doesn’t have a diploma and doesn’t have the best background either however she did fill out hundreds of applications and went to numerous job interviews so it’s not like she wasn’t trying. At one point she had gotten depressed and probably a bit too comfortable since she was having such a hard time finding a job that she became lazy and started lacking on cleaning up after herself like not doing the dishes after cooking meals. For a couple weeks I just ended up doing them myself and trying to be understanding. I eventually said something and she picked up her slack again. Some of the other things she’s done while being here is, she has gotten into a couple arguments with my boyfriend but nothing too serious just petty disagreements (she honestly has an attitude problem), our birthdays are two days apart so we decided to celebrate ours together since she didn’t have much money. She ended up making me almost 30 minutes late to our dinner reservation because she’s HORRIBLE with time management and she ended up forgetting her card so I actually paid for her meal which was not cheap since it was a fine dining restaurant and now that I think of it she still hasn’t paid me back for that, she finally got a job about two months ago and I had numerous issues with her forgetting to lock the door which I talked to her immediately about as she doesn’t have the funds to replace any of my items if someone were to steal my things and it just felt like an argument so I pretty much told her that she can either remember to lock the front door or she’ll have to figure out somewhere else for her to live. So mainly all of these problems that I’ve had with her have been pretty small and not anything that I would think should end a friendship however this past weekend I was out of town celebrating my boyfriends sisters graduation and at some point my friend had went on the balcony and smoked a cigarette. When she was done she threw it in our small trash can that we have out on the balcony. Apparently it wasn’t all the way out and the wind kept it burning so the trash can eventually started burning. She was unaware until my neighbor across the hall came and knocked on the door. She put it out immediately. There wasn’t any property damage for it whatsoever and it had just barely burned the bottom of the trashcan. I didn’t know about this until this Sunday when her mom told me…. Well apparently that neighbor reported it to the manager because on Monday she called me and told me she was giving me a 30 day notice to vacate!!! All my friend had to say was that she was sorry and that it was an accident which clearly does nothing for the situation… She has gotten me kicked out of my apartment because of her own stupidity and now I’m basically going to be homeless with my child and boyfriend as we don’t have any money saved up for a new place because we clearly were not expecting having to move. (I am staying with my grandma but still I’m beyond irritated because obviously I don’t want to do that it but I’m given no choice until we can save our money up which will take like 2-3 months but still) She did say she would pay for a uhual and help me pack but that clearly doesn’t make up for getting me evicted… Almost the whole day she was just complaining like “I don’t know what I’m going to do. I truly am cursed” Which I did NOT want to hear at all because like dude not only is your life fucked but now you have fucked mine and all she can do is sit there and complain about her liking situation now as if it’s not literally her fault… I truly don’t want to be her friend after this because how am I going to help out of the kindness of my heart and get royally fucked over for it… Then to make matters worse she’s told me that I and her mom could apply for places together and then all of us live together in a new place & the reason being is because 1. She can’t pass a background check and doesn’t have enough income alone to qualify so she wouldn’t even be able to be on the lease bc of her background, 2. Her mom doesn’t have enough income by herself so her and her mom aren’t able to get a place together since they wouldn’t be able to combine their income due to her background… I don’t know if they think I’m dumb or what but clearly they just want to use me to be able to get a new place which I ABSOLUTELY WILL NOT BE DOING. Genuinely get real why the fuck would I be willing to help again when she’s the reason why I got kicked out of my place and willing to live with her again after the issues that I’ve had lmaoo not happening… So needless to say I don’t even want to be her friend anymore over this and I know it was an accident but it cost me my housing and could’ve been avoided to begin with..