What should I do?
Me and my ex were together for about 3 years. We broke up recently because she said her feelings/love weren’t there anymore. There were definitely problems in our relationship, and I know I played a part in them. I did things before that made her feel like she wasn’t being chosen or prioritized, and it damaged her trust in me.
We haven’t been together for a little while, and I’ve been trying to deal with the breakup. I have talked to another girl since we broke up, but it’s honestly just been friendly texting. I don’t want anything serious with her and I wouldn’t have slept with her or anything like that.
Today my ex came over and we talked. She told me she wants to try talking again. She even told me her sister tried setting her up with another guy and she didn’t want it. She also asked me if I’d been talking to any females. I said no, which wasn’t completely true because I’ve been texting that one girl. I said no because I’m scared my ex will hear that and immediately think I slept with someone, moved on, or was replacing her.
Now we’re talking about what we’d need to change if we tried again. She says she’s going to want to look through my phone because trust between us is bad. I’m willing to be open with her, but I don’t want our entire relationship to become her checking my phone constantly. I want to actually rebuild trust instead of living under surveillance.
I’m also seriously considering deleting most of my social media anyway. I mainly kept it because I’d get bored/lonely, and I don’t really care about it that much. I even considered deleting TikTok because it keeps suggesting my other ex when I search, and I know that would probably cause unnecessary problems.
The thing is, I’m genuinely willing to change. I want to be more honest, loyal, communicate better, make her feel chosen, and stop doing things that create unnecessary problems. But I’m scared I’ll do all of that and she’ll still leave me.
If you were me, would you try again? And how would you handle the trust/phone situation and the fact that I wasn’t completely honest about talking to another girl?