u/FarUnderstanding4887

My husband and I have been married for two years, and in that time, we’ve only taken two trips as a couple. Both were great, and we had a blast! (Really want to state that)

About a month ago, we started talking about going away for Memorial Day weekend. We had Multiple conversations about it. EVEN talked about BUDGET
We picked to stay in the town We’re we had are honeymoon at!
(The place we stayed at was already booked up.)
He specifically asked me to put together a list of options with amenities he likes.
( I love to plan it’s what I’m great at)
I spent a ton of time on this. I presented him with. 17 Airbnb options some with hot tubs like he likes! The other half no hot tubs.
I also picked out some hotels if he rather do that..
His response at the time? "Let me think about it."
It’s been two weeks since then. When I finally pushed for a decision, he hit me with a complete reversal. Now he says he’s "hesitant" to go because he doesn’t want to "blow through money" and then not have a “good time”

(Want to state we both work and have separate bank accounts one shared Savings account)

I feel like he’s just making excuses to justify backing out. I’m mostly upset because he sat through weeks of conversations and let me do hours of research knowing he was feeling this way, rather than just being honest from the start.
When I told him he waisted my time he responded saying “no I didn’t”
I feel completely ignored and dismissed.
He said we would talk about it this weekend and I can just show him the list again.
I told him No that when I made that list most of the places are now booked for Memorial Day weekend. That he would need to make his own list now he was not happy hearing that response.

How do I get him to understand that this isn't just about the trip, but about the respect for my time and the "mental load" I took on at his request? Him just not being honest from the start.

I also want to say that I truly truly think that he completely making all this up that he actually forgot all the places I showed him. So he thought logically him saying “I’m worried about not having a good time” would somehow not make me upset and he just kept digging the hole for himself.

What ever the case is none of this seems ok to me.

I (30F) got to thinking Thursday morning how much I missed that intensity of a "breakup" and the incredible makeup sex that follows.
so I decided to pitch a wild idea to my husband (30M).

I texted him: "Do you want to play 'Break Up'?"

The idea was that we’d spend the day acting like we were breaking up over text, then "get back together have great sex "

It worked out way better than I ever expected!

We both ended up having a terrible, high-stress day at work.
What started as "play fighting" actually turned into us venting about little things that had been annoying us lately. Because we had framed it as a game, we didn't take anything to heart. It became this amazing safety valve to release all the stress the workday was causing.
By the time we got home, we weren't angry

we were actually giggling and laughing because we’d spent the afternoon trying to think of the "craziest" comebacks to send to one another. It turned a bad day into a hilarious bonding experience.
And for the record... the "makeup sex" was absolutely wonderful. ;)
We talked about it afterward and decided this is going to be a something we would try more often . It’s a great way to clear the air, have a laugh, and keep things spicy. 10/10 would recommend!