Adult kid stopped responding
throw away account because my daughter uses reddit.
I think my daughter isn’t talking to me and I don’t know if I should keep reaching out.
I have two kids with my ex-wife, the oldest (daughter, 43) and my son (40). I divorced the ex almost 20 years ago. My ex probably has some kind of borderline personality problem and right before the divorce was final she attacked my daughter in the car. My daughter ended up getting a permanent restraining order against her mother.
Right after that my daughter moved out of state and hasn't had anything to do with her mother or mother's family since then. My son got married four years ago but his mother was there so my daughter wasn't invited. That wedding was the last time I saw or interacted with my ex, otherwise I avoid any phone calls or unregistered letters. Six months ago I signed for a fedex package before realizing it was from the ex-wife. In it she said she "found" and old education fund and wanted me to give the money to our daughter. I sent it to my daughter without thinking, but I did call and tell her it was on the way. I offered to support however she wanted to respond but she said it was fine and didn't seem that bothered.
I know she's busy with her own life but it’s been almost six months since I heard from her again and we used to talk every week. I called her when her niece was born and we chatted for a bit but that was it. I found out from LinkedIn she lost her job recently but she never said anything about it. I sent her some money and long email and got a short one back but she didn't say much. I'm going to send her a birthday package early and I want to come visit but she said to wait until her job situation gets settled.
Should I keep trying? Or should I just let her have her space? I guess she's mad at me or mad at her mom but there's nothing I can do about that. She doesn't want to come visit, she ignores when I bring up the trip to Europe we always talked about. She's always been sensitive and I think therapy is just making things worse.