WIBTA If I tell a friend to shut up about her wishing she could join a trip
I'm(F31) going to England in about a month for 3 weeks. I have worked really hard to save for this trip and worked on my health to be able to go.
I have a friend, Ash(F30) who I've known for years now that has always wanted to go. I didnt ask her to join because I know how she is. We both are on the spectrum but she has alot more difficulties then me. She has to plan everything to the letter and once she gets stuck on a subject she can't get off of it.
Her and her family are decently well off. They go on trips all the time, cruises and overseas. Where this is my first and chances are only trip I will ever be able to have.
I'm aware her family won't let her go on a trip overseas by herself, and that this is on her bucket list, but I still didn't invite her along. I have kept my mouth mostly shut about the trip to not get her jelous nor started on wanting to go.
If she did go with me I have no doubts that not only she would have to plan everything but her parents wouldn't allow her to do certain things in her itinerary which mean I most likely wouldn't of been able to.
Her parents have agreed to take me to the airport because the closest one is a few hours away and I am really grateful for this. I found out today Ash has taken off that day so she can ride along.
I know she won't stop saying she wishes she could join, and I should check out this or that. If I make a comment of what I'm planning to do she'll go on about it.
I absolutley love her but I'm afraid I'm gonna snap and tell her to shut up. I've never been on a plane, this is a 22+ hour trip there with a layover. I'm gonna be mentally tired already psyching myself up that I can do this.
Edit: I'm not planning to be rude to her nor do I want to be. The way I had originally looked at me not talking about it to her was trying not to make her sad about not being able to go, but seeing what some of you have commented, maybe this wasnt the right idea. I should of gone a differently way about it
Also want to add here that her parents weren't my original ride, I was looking at a shuttle to the airport from my town but they found out, still not quiet sure how since I never told them this, but they offered to take me.
Edit:
I have realized something here that I've made a huge mistake on how I explained it all. I have tried to avoid the trip as a topic with her, in my mind, not to make her sad and jelous of not being able to go. I get asked when I hang out with her and her family things about the trip and I try to avoid it. But have come to realize that was not fair to her. Where I wanted to avoid those feeling I didnt take into consideration that I was depriving her excitment for it.
I am defantlky TA here for that and need to consider actually talking with her about this. Not just trying to avoid the subject as a whole