u/FeelingSad6654

I’m a 24m and have been a chronic user of weed since 17. Lived by myself senior year of HS (unique situation, my parents aren’t neglectful lol) and then when Covid hit I went to college, joined a frat, and because all of our classes were online I was smoking pretty much all day every day freshman year. This was a slippery slope as I have been battling marijuana addiction for the past 6 years now (I don’t drink alcohol anymore, unrelated). I have taken probably 6 months of total tolerance breaks within that time, the most recent being completely sober from January to April of this year. I felt great, was sleeping better, eating better, seeing more progress in the gym, more charismatic and social, more productive at work, and I actually had goals and stuck to them. I was convinced I would never smoke again and excited about that. Then I got the flu and in my delirious state rationalized “just a little edible would’t hurt. By the next week I was going through a cart a day again. There are actually so many benefits to sobriety from marijuana and I know them, but quitting is still so hard. I am writing this as I lay in bed, unable to sleep because again I am attempting sobriety and on only my second night after a hard relapse. I’ve let weed waste my time, money, ruin multiple relationships of mine, bring me immense stress and anxiety, yet I still want it so bad and I just wish I never touched it in my life. Don’t have a question or anything just wanted to write this out I guess. Please let me know if you have any advice or just want to vent or share your experience trying to leave as well. If anyone responds I am going to try and update this post in the future with my progress. If you read this far, thanks, I sincerely wish you the best in your quitting journey.