At my wits end with toddler
I have a newly 2 year old toddler. We have our autism screening next week so I don’t even know if she is autistic or not. She has been in OT since 18 months but behaves so wonderfully for them that there’s not much else they can do. Her OT said she needs behavioral therapy and our pediatrician says the same but they won’t let her start until after autism diagnosis which can’t be given before 2 here.
My daughter has some serious issues with emotional regulation at the very least. Any minor inconvenience will send her into a huge spiral. She screams until she is purple, goes limp, bites herself as hard as she can and pulls chunks of her hair out. It’s horrible to watch. Then two seconds later she can be fine again until something else sets her off. The only things I have found that help regulate her are bubbles and high movement (swinging, spinning, etc.) which isn’t always doable. Any time we are in the car she just covers her ears and screams her head off, it’s draining. I feel so bad for her but I’m at a loss about what to even do any more… I know toddlers can be temperamental but this is so an extreme in my opinion. It’s all day long. I stress about having to take her places because of her meltdowns, but it’s also draining to just stay at home with her all day.
She stares off into space at nothing and the only way to get her to stop is by making eye contact with her and then she flips out, it’s scary, but doctor said it’s likely another behavioral thing, not seizures or anything. She never sits still, not even for a second for the entire day. She gave up naps months ago so I don’t have a break the entire day. I’m also 6 months pregnant with our second and I’m worried this baby will be as angry as she is… and I know that sounds terrible to say…
I genuinely don’t even know if any of these traits suggests autism in any way, my MIL certainly tells me every time I see her that it’s all normal and I’m crazy for thinking she’s different. My daughter will act perfect around other people and then as soon as we’re alone again she breaks down and has meltdowns. It’s extremely exhausting because no one even believes me when I try to bring up her behavior. I am also autistic and my husband as well, which doesn’t make things easier. I know this probably sounds dramatic, but I genuinely don’t even know what to do any more. I am just hoping and praying they let her take behavioral therapy to help with some of these behaviors. I guess does any one have any similar experiences with their autistic child acting this way as a toddler? Or should I expect for her not to get an autism diagnosis based on how she behaves?