u/FerretMotor9453

if yall got coke lmk

edit: msc seaside

i have a horrible family history of addiction on both sides. i’ve dabbled in drugs, have done shrooms, xanax, cocaine, meth, smoked weed, molly, drank a lot of alcohol and i think that’s it? i’m not sure but coke, alcohol and xans are really my achilles heel. i did coke a bunch and i still drink a good amount. all i can fucking think about 24/7 is getting my hands on some drugs. whether i’m drunk or sober it’s all i think about. how can i get coke? i have a beautiful amazing gf, a place of my own, a car, a job i love but i constantly think about throwing it all away for any drug. thinking of how upset my gf would feel stops me most times but the cravings are just getting worse, ever day i get closer to relapsing and i just don’t know what to do. my gf knows what i’ve done but i don’t think she understands addiction since she’s not really been addicted to anything. we go to music festivals and go out w friends and such and her family members do drugs and it all is making the cravings so much worse. but in all honesty sitting at home wouldn’t help either. i have no idea what to do, if it wasn’t frowned upon i would deadass just do drugs all the time in my free time. i’d obviously still go to work and such but holy shit i honestly just wish i could do drugs and not be judged and shit. i’m going crazy thinking about them 24/7 help.

edit: im tipsy while writing this post… i don’t feel i’m getting my point across the way i want but idk.