Worried I won’t see my ldr bf when planned [VENT]
This is just a vent im not really expecting advice or anything of the sort but I would VERY MUCH appreciate it if anyone has input.
So to start off, me and my bf are both young and met on TikTok (which we later deleted because it became unbearable). We’ve been together for almost two years completely online, no meet up. Our plan to meet is in AUGUST around his 18th birthday. He’s in WA, I’m TX. So first issue is that we are literally across the country from each other and so young. (I know it could be worse but this is ALOT of distance to me) neither of us have an income yet and it honestly doesn’t seem like either of our parents are willing to help us.
BUT what really upsets me is that we really have had NO plan. My mom has always been a little bit off put by him coming here, but she’s made it seem like she would help me see him FOR THE LAST TWO YEARS. My boyfriend and his parents too.
Except, it’s coming up in a few months and plane tickets get expensive FAST. The ones I found were already 600 and rising until august. I’ve brought this up recently to everyone involved and I get turned down almost every time. I either get an “I don’t know yet” or I just get straight up ignored.
It really feels like I’m the only one who cares about this, and I feel led on. I wish that if they knew it most likely wasn’t going to happen they wouldn’t have told me it would. I understand that some of you will probably think this was stupid to believe in to begin with due to our circumstances, which yeah now I feel stupid.
I feel heartbroken too because I’ve been waiting since we met to finally see him, and it’s honestly the only reason I’ve been holding on. I just don’t know how I’m going to deal if it doesn’t happen, and it really doesn’t seem like it’s going to.
I dropped out of school because of my eating disorder and depression and lost most of my friends. (I have 1 or 2 now) so he’s really the only thing I have left, and he means so so much to me. 😭
I guess I just don’t really feel supported in my relationship by anyone I know. which yeah that comes with ldr, but jeez it’s breaking my heart😭 my boyfriend says he wants to see me and he definitely shows it more/makes more of an effort, but it feels like he also avoids conversations about it.
SORRY THIS IS KINDA LONGGG I just want someone to care about this as much as I do or at least be happy for me and help me see him. :(