I (19m) and my boyfriend (19m) recently started living together. He moved out of his parents house where him and his twin sister (19f) stayed.
Ever since he’s moved out, she’s been going down a dangerous path that even he’s getting fed up with.
Last night he got a text from her and when he was listening to it (audio message), he got visibly more and more distraught and upset. I asked him what was wrong and he told me.
She has begun:
- Seeing a 26 year old man
- This 26 yo man as a 2 yo
- This man still lives with his “wife” who had the kid with him
- He has plans on leaving her but hasn’t yet
Upon hearing this, I also proceeded to lose my shit. I got really angry and kinda texted her in a rage.
Long story short, I called her a dumbass who is ruining her own life for a man.
For further context, she recently got out of a four year relationship with her highschool sweetheart who happened to be a woman. His sister used to be a lesbian and is now “bisexual” after meeting this one man. (There is nothing wrong with discovering you’re bi after a relationship, but this just seems like such a horrible way of doing it)
She recently got fired from her job for serving her underage coworker alcohol from the bar they worked at. She is also underage and doesn’t have an ABC license (for non Americans you have to be 18 to serve alcohol, 21 to drink, and you need an ABC license to serve drink/food).
She has been getting blackout drunk and high every night with that underage friend. Their friend ended up going to the hospital for alcohol poisoning and got fired from her job as well because she was drunk on the job.
His sister graduated from trade school early and could easily get a job in our hometown (there is a high demand in her field). She hasn’t even bothered to TRY and find a job and now just wants to DoorDash.
My biggest pet peeve with her is that she just makes her own life worse and complains about it.
Maybe I’m just not a normal young adult/teen but I feel like this is such a slippery slope to fall into. She already has some mental health issues that she can’t get help for because of their insurance. I suspect she has BPD or some type of personality disorder because she gets upset by little triggers.
Looking back on what I texted her, I may have been a little mean but no one else in her life will tell her she’s being stupid. My boyfriend doesn’t want to cause anymore family drama but fully agrees with me.
Their mutual friend said it was really hateful and that she’s pissed I said anything but honestly the friend is part of the problem too for encouraging this behavior.
I don’t know, it’s not my life so maybe I should mind my business but I don’t want to watch her get groomed into a life she definitely isn’t prepared for. God forbid she accidentally ends up pregnant or in the hospital too. Maybe I was too harsh with telling her she’s fucking stupid for doing this and acting so flippant.