Freeze embryos at 30 or wait until 31 for a fresh transfer?
My wife and I are in the process of adopting a little girl (she’s 6), and we’re currently building attachment/bonding with her. Because of that, I really don’t want to get pregnant right now and accidentally shift the focus away from her during such an important transition.
At the same time, I’m 30 and starting IVF planning. I don’t have any known fertility issues, but I’ve also never tried to conceive before since I’m a lesbian, so I guess I technically don’t know if there are hidden issues.
I keep going back and forth between:
doing egg retrievals now at 30, creating embryos, testing them with PGT-A, and freezing them for later
or waiting until next year when I’m 31 and doing everything then, possibly with a fresh transfer instead of freezing
Part of my anxiety is age/fertility decline and worrying that if I wait, I’ll end up with fewer euploid embryos or unexpected issues with egg quality/endometrium/etc.
Another layer is that I only want to transfer female embryos. We only have one children’s bedroom, and I personally wouldn’t feel comfortable having a boy and girl share a room long term, so we’d use PGT-A partly for sex selection too. I know some people have opinions about that, but please be kind.
I also have a lot of fear around pregnancy/childbirth in general — like developing complications, not being able to have a vaginal birth, or something going wrong medically.
So I guess my real question is:
Would doing retrievals now at 30 realistically make a meaningful difference compared to waiting until 31?
Has anyone here delayed transfer because of adoption/bonding/family timing and been glad they froze embryos first?
Would especially love hearing from people who did IVF with no known fertility issues but mainly because of same-sex family building.