I feel like a fraud to others
I (27F and Catholic) have been contemplating abstaining for two years before I decided to follow through. I want to wait till marriage for religious reasons. I finally decided to be serious about abstaining 5 months ago. I feel great about my choice because I have more energy, a clearer head etc. But after sleeping with 15 people total in my life I feel like a fraud for wanting to abstain now and in the future. I feel like men I attempt to date judge me for having had sex with so many people in the past or don’t take the abstinence seriously. I have no issues with finding men to date, but being abstinent seems to be a deal breaker for them (even other Christian men). I feel like I’m too secular for religious men and too religious for secular men. It’s kind of a lonely place to be and I fear because I’m abstinent I may never find a husband.