My girl- bestfriend has been talking to my ex for the past year
I (20M) broke up with this girl(20) last year when we were both 19 years old, many factors played into our break up mainly that she was going to move overseas and long distance was not going to work for us. It was a mutual, well mannered, and well communicated break up with no bad blood lingering afterwards. I told her(the ex) afterwards i was going to go no contact now that we broke up. I've seen a lot of people dating while i was growing up and so I know what will stop a person from moving past a failed relationship. I've had feelings for a girl waaaay in the past who lead me on for like 2 or 3 years before ghosting me (boohoo so sad rip young me, anyways) and i didnt want this (which by the way would've been my first real relationship nearing adulthood) to be a bad experience, so everyday afterwards I read about how to handle breakups in a healthy way and let myself process my emotions around the break up, not wanting to keep anything in the bag of thoughts about my ex relationship. I really did try to move on and I wanted this to be a good learning experience for me, no matter how sad i let myself feel, i made sure i understood that she was gone and we broke up and I did our best but not everything works out, and thats okay. Spent a year force feeding myself the truth and not letting my mind wander on delusional perspectives, mixed with a bunch of other life challenges during the course of last year.
So tell me why, my girl best friend (20F. friends for almost 3 years now) has my ex's instagram account in her DMs, and has spoken to her within the last 2 weeks?
Now I firmly do believe that what my ex does is definitely not my business anymore, and my best friend can be friends with whoever, and knowing her, she'd be really responsible about her relationships too. Yet she has my ex in her instagram DMs???
When my best friend broke up with her exes, I've unfollowed them, and shared my opinion on them openly and did not give them an ounce of good will considering how horrid they were to her, i would not cross the boundary of keeping contact WITH MY BEST FRIEND'S EX. so why was that not something that came across this girl's mind? My best friend is genuinely a thoughtful person, she's kind hearted and is basically a geek that smokes weed on occasion (which i do not), I also know for a fact that she does not "like" me, how? through methods (long story just trust me bro)
I've spent so much time, so much work to make myself move on without doing an unnecessary spiral over someone I have broke up with, my best friend knows this too, I've told her about the struggles.
What do they speak about? no clue, do not care. What i do care about though though; is just the fact that they are speaking, and the thought of my ex not being in my life anymore was just my ignorance my best friend kept from me, letting my ex basically hover in the shadow. Mind you i was not even a good boyfriend to my ex, i was just below average at best in terms of boyfriend material, and i was hella immature and insecure (beautiful combo huh?) while we dated.
I'm going over to my best friend's house in the morning (its currently 2 am while i type this) and i do plan on bringing this up.
what do you guys think? am I over reacting? maybe they both actually are just friends and dont even bother with my history with my ex at all... i dunno.