Hi there, wasn’t really sure what to title this because this is kinda a specific situation I’m in, anyway here it is.
So, me [21 male] and my friend/kinda past love interest [21 female], have basically been doing this thing for multiple months where we start talking/playing games online together and texting, which would then lead us to eventually going on a date, and afterwards, we kinda fall off from talking with each other, this has happened twice.
For some context on how the dates go from my perspective, it honestly goes well, theres the usual somewhat awkwardness that comes from dates, especially since we are both kind of introverted, I think the main issue ends up being that we’re both so nervous that neither of us end up making a significant enough of a move to break through the awkwardness, so to speak. But all and all, I end up having a good time, and it seems like she does too, especially the second time we tried it.
Here comes the problem, and I’ll use the last time mostly as an example. After our last date, I remember asking if she’d be interested in going out with me again sometime, and she reciprocated interest in going again. But afterwards, as the days went by, I noticed she was initiating conversation and interacting with me less and less. So, I decided I’d ask her to play a game with me one more time before stepping away from contacting her regularly to kinda test whether she’d reach out to me, because I was worried that she was just too nervous to tell me that she wasn’t actually interested potentially.
So, after talking that last time, I stopped initiating our conversations, and to my heavy disappointment, she did not text or call or anything to me for over 2 weeks. Until my birthday came around and she sent me a quick message for that, but besides that, radio silence. So, I just, stopped messaging her as well, and we fell off again. I’m not going to lie, I’m 100% a sensitive person, which is why I didn’t just communicate with her, because looking back, I wish I was just direct and asked her if she was actually into me like that or not, because we could’ve maybe just stayed friends.
Anyways, now going to present time. I decided to message her recently asking if she’d like to play some games with me some time, and she responded very quickly saying yes, and even said that she was recently thinking about asking me the same thing. So now, I’m in this situation again, where I’m just so unsure as to where this is headed and how I should act.
I’ve thought about the past experience we’ve had, and now I’m wondering if maybe she was just looking for me to initiate our conversations, like maybe she was feeling even more nervous to reach out since we had brought romance into the mix, and that maybe it was my fault for reading into it like that, and acting dramatically rather than being clear and communicating.
So, I guess I’m just looking for outsider’s perspective on something like this, either way, I’m just going into it with expectations of just being friends. But I’m not going to lie, I do honestly still have feelings for her, but I have no idea if she still does for me. But if she still did, I’d hate to not know and not act on it.
I’d appreciate any input that you guys could give me, because I’m pretty conflicted right now.