When I told her I wanted a divorce, I explained her all the reasons. She's the one I went to stay with for two weeks after announcing my divorce. I was counting on her.
But reality was quite different.
After my breakup, I had a very spicy text exchange with a man. She received screenshots of the conversation because it was simultaneously hot, ridiculous, and funny. I knew I wasn't going to go any further than texting with this man.
At a party she was at, I was completely drunk and I slept with someone. I started seeing this person regularly because, in the end, we got along really well. She was the only one to know about that.
She once told me that my ex had shown up at her place while I was at work, looking for me, and that he had been violent with her. She made me afraid of him, manipulated me by saying I now had to be careful not to be alone with him, that he was violent, that femicides were a real problem. And I believed her...even though he's clearly not a violent person.
My ex is close to my family, especially my grandmother. After our breakup, he went to her house a lot to talk. My dad and my grandma saw my best friend quite often; she was helping me with things and the packing. She took advantage of some private conversations to turn me against my own family, telling me every day how disappointed I must be that my family was helping my ex and leaving me alone. I don't usually talk much about my problems; I didn't go crying to my parents' house like my ex did. She took advantage of that weakness to turn me against them. She told me my father was ashamed to have brought such a cold and insensitive daughter into the world. It broke my heart.
One night when I wasn't at her place—the only night, and only she knew where —she launched her attack. My ex contacted me to tell me how disappointed he was in me, that I wasn't respecting him by sleeping with another guy, that he wanted to kill himself, etc. But how did he know? I spent over an hour on the phone with him trying to calm him down. He'd had several disproportionate reactions in messages, and I didn't understand why it was suddenly coming from. My best friend went to his place with my ex's best friend in the middle of the night to make sure he wasn't doing anything wrong. She told me to rest, to enjoy my night, and that she'd take care of everything. That was a huge relief.
When I woke up a few hours later, my world came crashing down. My ex had gotten the screenshots of the spicy chat I mentioned earlier, and he decided to send them to my dad and my grandma. They were shocked, and rightly so... I felt terribly humiliated and attacked. So much so that I told my family to get lost; I couldn't take it anymore.
My dad managed to talk me out of it and make me understand who was behind it all. Her.
Two or three days after I left my ex's place, she was telling him I'd regret what I'd done, that I'd come back to him, that it was only a matter of time. After some time, she finally told him that I regretted leaving but that I had gone too far in my actions to go back.
She told him I was cheating on him, which is completely false. She sent him screenshots of my intimate conversation, explaining that I had slept with someone and that I was at this person's house the night he snapped at me. Because of this, my ex had gone through some of my conversations on my computer, which was still at his place at the time.
She told him that I was telling everyone I was afraid of him, that I was afraid he would hit me or even kill me. Besides, the story about him supposedly hitting her at her house is completely fabricated.
We had sexual problems with my ex; to satisfy myself, I used sex toys. She knew about this, but he didn't because he was against it. She went and told him I had toys because he was sexually bad.
She told him and some mutual friends that she was fed up with me crashing at her place (I stayed there for about two weeks), that I'd turned her house into a pigsty (she's borderline hoarder and I helped her clean while I was there), that I was a dirty girl, that I'd doubled her bills even though I paid absolutely everything while I was there.
Lots of things like that.
I'd already seen her act more or less the same way with other people; I told her it wasn't right, but thats all. Honestly, I thought she'd never do this to me. We've been friends since we were 12 (I'm 25 now), it's not a recent friendship... I've rarely been so angry with someone, so disappointed, and yet it's not even that surprising in the end... I obviously cut her out of my life. She tried to justify herself by telling even more lies.
Despite all this, I'm very sad. She was the only person who knew me inside and out, the only person I told everything to, the only person I was sure would listen and that I'd have a good time with. I miss her. But I could never go back to her.
Sorry if there's some misunderstanding, that's a lot and English is not my first language.