u/Firm-Commission9382

Does anyone else experience this shame and guilt for letting the avoidant do all this fucked up shit?

She showed me who she was, even told me that she’s not good for me, and I just kept sticking around for the good parts of the relationship.

I feel like I blame myself more than her for putting me through multiple discards, withdrawals, stonewalling, disrespect. I’m ashamed of myself for letting her walk all over me, for chasing her, shrinking my needs just to not push her away.

There should be a rehab for people who have experienced avoidant discard lol.

Like imagine – you lock yourself up there, no phone for x amount of time, group sessions where people share their experiences, some “letting go” workshop stuff, healthy distractions.

I have been through a lot of shit, but dealing with the trauma she left me with has been a real struggle. I would legit pay to sign myself up for a rehab like that…

I created two songs with the help of Suno, based on my experience with an avoidant. Lyrics were mainly written by me, if you want to listen:

https://on.soundcloud.com/sxRN0RBrzpCidYR5nq

https://on.soundcloud.com/CYfHM92b23Vj8Eny7F

I’m not looking for any followers or anything, it’s just feelings put into a song.

I feel like all of them use the same/similar lines

Here’s some mine has said:

-“i have other things to worry about than whatever this is”

- using your name instead of pet names when they’re in their “avoidant” state

- “I don’t want to hurt you anymore”

- “you will be okay”

- “I don’t want to talk about it”

- “I don’t feel the same way about you anymore”