My (27M) girlfriend (26F) considers me a burden. I genuinely don't know what to do.
My girlfriend (26f) and I (27m) have been dating for almost a year now. We have known each other for over a decade, both have served in the military, and about 1-2 months ago I just got out of my 7 year stint in the army. I moved in with her, and things have been rough since.
For context, about 8-9 months of our relationship have been online with daily phone calls and video calls with meet ups every few months.
Her chief complaint is I don't do anything around the house and I don't plan anything - she is feeling overwhelmed and stressed.
We have a large dog and live in an apartment. I am currently unemployed but have a good job offer that I'm just waiting on the start day for at the same company she works at. She works as an EMT and is in school as a paramedic student. Her schedule is basically work every day because she is saving up for big travel plans we have. I am a stay at home boyfriend for now, responsible for keeping the house clean and taking care of the dog until I start working. I have no savings due to financial mistakes I made when I was younger and still have bills to pay, so I occasionally rely on her for that as well. For further context, she is a workaholic and was working this much before I entered the picture.
She is aware of my job applications and my financial situation, I try to communicate as best I can and be upfront about my shortcomings. But we're always fighting. Mostly it's about how I don't clean well enough, or about how she feels overwhelmed and can't rely on me to get stuff done.
It's weird. Most days were fine, cute even. Then she watches a tiktok about men who suck, or I say something that triggers her and she explodes and the relationship is hanging by a thread, then things get better for a few days and the cycle repeats.
I'm genuinely at a loss.
Any advice would be appreciated on what I need to fix about myself or what I can do to salvage this and break the cycle.
Can I fix this by waiting it out or improving myself?
Some important information; she is diagnosed bipolar, PCOS, TBI's and ADHD. This isn't her first serious relationship, it is, however, my first.
I have PTSD, ADHD, Anxiety disorders and TBI's.
TLDR; My workaholic girlfriend thinks I'm a burden and complains I can't do anything right.