u/Firm_Raspberry7284

I’ve been watching porn for almost half my life, which feels strange to admit, but I’ve been trying for a long time to quit and haven’t found something that actually sticks.

I’ve tried pretty much everything: meditation, journaling, cold showers, blocking apps and websites, leaving my phone in another room, and other strategies. Some of them help for a short period, but nothing has felt like a real long-term solution.

Usually I’ll go days or even weeks doing well, then I end up slipping, relapsing, and the cycle starts all over again. My longest streak was a little over a month, and looking back, I realized I only went that long because I was trying to prove some friends wrong.

That made me notice something about myself: I seem to perform best when I’m fueled by pressure or wanting to prove people wrong. I almost work better out of spite than internal motivation.

I’m currently in the process of getting treated for ADHD, and I’m curious if medication helped anyone here with impulse control, compulsive habits, or quitting porn specifically. Did it make a noticeable difference, or was it still mostly about habits and discipline?

Would love to hear other people’s experiences.

I’m not doing the best mentally right now and honestly feel pretty lost.

I constantly deal with negative thoughts and keep thinking back to situations from my past that hurt me or left some kind of trauma. My mood feels all over the place. One moment I’ll feel okay and the next I’m sad again. Most days it’s more sadness than anything.

I’m also very hard on myself and have a really addictive personality, which makes it easy for me to get hooked on unhealthy things. Lately I’ve started feeling like I might never accomplish the goals and dreams I had for my life.

Like a lot of people, I just want to be successful and build a good life for myself. But recently I’ve started feeling like I’m at such a disadvantage compared to everyone else that I question if it’s even possible anymore. I feel exhausted and burned out all the time.

Financially things aren’t great either. I eat the same meals constantly and I’ve been trying hard to stop eating out and improve things, but I haven’t had much success. It feels like life is easier for everyone else while I struggle with basic things.

I’m starting to lose motivation for things I used to enjoy, and I’ve been having thoughts about not wanting to be here anymore. I’m in the process of getting on medication and hoping it helps with the negative thoughts and self-sabotage.

I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m tired, lost, and wondering if anyone else has felt like this and managed to turn things around.