AITA for losing my cool and yelling at my aunt
Soooo....I absolutely lost it on my moms sister. My mom had a health crisis last August and since then she can't live alone. We couldn't find an assisted living that accepted her insurance so we are on a waiting list. Until then I am her primary caregiver. She doesn't need that much help anymore however she can't be left alone for extended periods due to balance issues. So I can't work which means my husband is the only one bringing in a paycheck. I also have two teenagers M16 F 13. I am 38 F. My mom and I don't have the greatest relationship but she is my mom and I do love her even though she always preferred my sister. My sister died in 2023 and my dad died in 2009. So it's just us. We had an unexpected expense occur so money has been extra tight lately. My mom finally got approved for social security disability but has not received any payments yet. I called my mom's sister and asked for help but she said no. Normally I would've have said ok and move on but she has done something I felt was a little shady. For starters she moved my grandparents in to a nursing home over 3 and a half hours away due to this fact I didn't get to tell my grandpa goodbye before he passed and now I haven't seen my grandma since late 2023/early 2024. My grandparents raised me until I was 2 and were always my safe space. They knew home was never great and I didn't have to go into details. They were just there. My mom has struggled with mental health issues and my dad didn't always understand. It was great that I had grandma and grandpa to rely on. Not only did she move them that far away she also has control of all of the assets. My grandparents owned a huge ranch. I'm talking hundreds of heads of cattle grazing pastures haying pastures etcetera. So my husband saw a scrap metal pile and brought it to my mom's attention. He works for a scrap metal recycling company. He told mom he would volunteer his time so that his company didn't have to pay him or any other employees. The only thing he asked for was a cut of the total sale price. We weren't thinking a big percentage but maybe 15%. My mom brought it to my aunt and we didn't hear anything back so we called and asked and she went with another company and said we were not entitled to and proceeds of the sale. Ok fine I guess. So when my mom needed incontinence supplies and we were short on cash we called her. She told us no and to figure it out. Ok whatever. I then asked if it would be ok if mom stayed with her over the weekend as I had a thing to go to. My husband's boss and his wife just had their third baby and they are hosting a cookout/baby shower that we were invited to and I really wanted to attend. I can't leave my mom home alone that long so I asked if my aunt her sister could have her stay one weekend. She said no! Then I lost my ever loving mind! I yelled at her for everything! I even said somethings I regret. Not that they weren't true but they were in the past and forgotten. Now my mom is saying I should apologize and forget about it but I can't I just can't. I'm hurt and frustrated and feeling overwhelmed. All I asked for was a little bit of help and she can't do anything to help her sister! So am I the jerk for losing my cool and yelling at my aunt