I need to breakup with my Q, how do I start the conversation?
I have been with my alcoholic BF (mid 30s) for over 10 years (on and off) and his drinking has gotten horrible in the past few years. Unfortunately he isn’t a daily drinker, he drinks in benders. Like 5 day benders or more. I have been putting up with the promises to get better, “Im done drinking for good” and all of the excuses about how if I was more sexual he would be happier for about 2 years. In the sober times its easy to see how much i love him but my body and mind remembers how horrible and disgusting he is while drinking.
He gets suicidal at about day 4 almost every bender, but when he sobers up claims that it wasn’t really how he felt it was just the booze. Nothing I try to do helps in anyway, because he needs professional help but never actually goes to get it.
I can’t take it anymore, after finally telling my friends what has been going on everyone is worried for my safety and finally telling me how much they didn’t enjoy the way I change when I’m trying to cater to his feelings.
There are so many other things he does that have made me realize that he is a narcissistic person and I can’t unsee the truth. the rose colored glasses are off.
Really I just need help from all of the strong people in here I have been reading from, about how to start the conversation. He says he doesn’t want to talk right now because he is coming down off of the bender, but I need to have the talk soon because it’s killing me inside and I need to work out the logistics of the breakup.