[In Progress] [23,250] [Epic/Dark Fantasy] The Fissured Sky Cycle.
Hi all, this is my first post here! I'm just looking for some early feedback!
Gritty, atmospheric, and character-driven, featuring a hard magic system focused on craftsmanship.
^(Alden lives a subterranean existence on a continent trapped entirely beneath the earth. Hanging impossibly far above is the Ark—a colossal, ancient wooden sky-ship that pierced the cavern ceiling a century ago during a devastating calamity and remained caught in the Fissure. To the totalitarian religious regime known as The Sceptre, looking up at the Ark is strictly forbidden. To Alden, an apprentice artificer with an obsessive mind, it is a tormenting mystery.)
^(In his master Harkin's workshop, magic isn't a gift—it is a brutal, delicate trade. Using an etching stylus and a tuning fork, an artificer must listen to a crystal’s natural resonance to guide its flow. But Alden is stubborn; he is constantly trying to force stones into his own shape, resulting in nothing but shattered gems and failed patterns.)
^(Everything changes the day Alden realizes the strange, massive geometric markings on the hull of the forbidden Ark aren't structural seams at all. They are active resonance channels. The sky-ship itself has been inscribed.)
^(When his forbidden investigation draws the immediate, bloody crackdown of The Sceptre's enforcers, the Custodians, Alden is forced to flee. With a dangerous, stolen cobalt-blue crystal in his satchel, his master dead, and his Custodian brother Soren turning a blind eye to let him escape, Alden is cast out into a wider, terrifying world.)
^(Accompanied by a jovial, loud-mouthed trader named Brennach, Alden heads south to the city of Karsthuin. His mission: find Gavric Roulf, a volatile cage-fighter hidden deep within the Drownways underbelly who might hold the key to his master’s secrets. To survive, Alden must finally stop forcing his own path, learn to listen to the resonance of the world around him, and unlock the mystery of the crystal before the Sceptre hunts him down.)
I'm looking for feedback regarding character dynamics, overall engagement, pacing, atmosphere, worldbuilding clarity!
I am open to a manuscript swap!
If you are interested in diving into a world of underground canals, forbidden sky-ships, and blood-soaked fighting pits, please comment below or DM me!