Love lost but now expecting
I’m 34M married to 36F. We’ve been together for 13 years and married for 8. We are 20 weeks pregnant.
I’m trying to keep this story as short as possible so please excuse missing details as I’m listing major events and my feelings.
My wife and I dated about 5 years at Uni. She has had a pretty rough life growing up and she was having a hard time when we met. As we dated I kind took care of her and although always felt there is much missing and some compatibility issues I thought these things are normal in relationships and I just have to man up (some societal pressures of course). After dating for 5 years I decided to ask her to marry me as I couldn’t see anymore reason to delay. The day I asked het I had this immense feeling of regret, but I couldn’t get myself to break her heart and again, thought these feelings are normal. The same story goes when we got married.
I love and have loved this woman by sacrificing my own happiness to not break her heart.
These feelings of regret has been growing stronger and stronger each year.
Fast forward to today. We are 20 weeks pregnant, and I am now loosing it. I cannot seem to immagine going on like this for the rest of my life. I’m just not in love and never have been.
Our relationship is on the eye pretty good. She is a great person and a great wife. We get along well, and never fight. But I feel I have sacrificed every peace of to not hurt her.
Any one here have had the same experience and what did you do in the end?