What should I do?
I’m not officially diagnosed but I strongly suspect I have BDD. I struggle to make close friends in real life and often avoid hangouts if it involves outdoor lighting or me going without makeup. And I regularly skip school because I spend hours overthinking and looking at my flaws
As a result the only close friend i have is purely online and has never seen me. However, there is a chance they might come visit me. Unfortunately, a huge conflict for me is that they’re very much into the “looksmaxxing” community — in the sense that they look down on “ugly” people
I have never told them about how I struggle with the way I look. In fact, I’ve even lied to them and acted as though I was someone attractive so they would view me in a better light. I feel ashamed and horrible about this situation. I dont know what to do or say, I don’t want them to be disgusted with me but I just know they will.
Should I tell them? Or avoid meeting them? How would I even bring it up and be taken seriously? I think either way some level of trust in the friendship will be broken