Ahmadi weddings and the double standards around pardah
Can we please talk about the double standards when it comes to pardah at weddings? Even though they are supposed to be so Islamic - no music, no dancing, gender segregation.
I agree, that part is Islamic, but there's a catch.
The part when the men's side comes over to the women's side.
(Only relatives of course, whether it's your brother, cousin or your 10th-degree uncle)
They say it's only relatives, but the women are there full face of makeup, no hijab, hair fully styled...
Some put a dupatta over their head (mostly office holders, especially those you know on a national level) but as soon as you take pictures on the stage, they take it off and everyone is staring at them.
On one hand you get shamed if you don't wear hijab outside, but at weddings or Jalsa everything is different. No pardah at all…
The few who still wear it there, wear it from the heart, which is good.
But for everyone else it's seen as freedom to take it off, which just shows me again: most don't want to wear it and yet too many are forced to - including me back then.
And honestly, what I never understood is how loose Ahmadis are with pardah when it comes to non-mahrams. Cousins are not mahram, not even distant cousins or your uncle's brother-in-law's son. In Islam they are clearly non-mahram, but in the Ahmadiyya community it's just normalized. No pardah in front of them, hugging, mixing, full glam in front of them, and no one says anything.
If pardah is so important that you get judged for not wearing it outside, why does the principle suddenly not count when it's your cousin? That‘s something I never understood…