u/Footzilla69

My life has been a sh*t show (mentally) for a while now. Single mom of a high needs autistic 7 year old, PMDD, unmedicated ADHD, C-PTSD, OCD, anxiety and binge eating disorder. I wake up anxious and that's usually how most days are from start to finish. I feel like my nervous system is completely shot. I told myself I would never try an SSRI again after escitalopram because it quite literally made me want to jump out of a window which terrified me so my doctor got me off of it immediately. The tapering off that was horrendous. 12 days straight up brain zaps with every step I took. I could hardly function.

That was all terrible but what if fluoxetine will be different for me? I feel like my life is a shell. Apart from taking my child places, I'm housebound. I used to love going out. Last year when she was in school I never went out to do anything for myself and if I did I was terrified the whole time and would often get panic attacks needing to take an Uber home straight away. I'm sick of the panic attacks I have every week. This is one of the main reasons my doctor wants me to try fluoxetine. I of course read horror stories of how it worsened panic attacks for people, my doctor prescribed me some Ativan to use while I'm starting.

I'm just rambling at this point I'm sorry.

Should I take it 🥺 I'm scared lol

Edit: I took the medication shortly after posting this and it's probably placebo but I'm feeling quite calm. Even if it's placebo it's something good I guess 😂 fingers crossed this is the one for me.

Edit# 2: This is probably placebo but I feel really good. I've gotten more cleaning done than I have in months my house was in such disarray. I'm really hoping this isn't serotonin syndrome? I was diagnosed with bipolar 2 in 2014 but my current doctor doesn't think I have it. I agree with her. I'm just a bit nervous about that. But hey, a win is a win I'll take it lol. I will keep an eye on this though.

Edit: Hi everyone, please feel free to still share your successful stories for anyone else who is possibly looking for something like this, but for now I have decided to stay on my regular dose for the foreseeable future.

I take Lamotrigine 275mg

I'm wondering if anyone else has tapered off after being on this drug for a very long time? My body is so sensitive to medications etc. I've been on 275 mg for years. My new doctor thinks I don't have bipolar type 2. I agree with her. Last year I was diagnosed with ADHD, PMDD and anxiety. I know many of us have been misdiagnosed unfortunately.

Anyway, I started wondering who I am without this drug.. I was 21 years old when I started it. I was a raging alcoholic and drug user probably due to dopamine seeking from ADHD and trying to regulate my emotions. All of that fun stuff. That's not who I am anymore. I'm a 33 year old single mom who maybe has a half glass of wine at Christmas. I just got to thinking why am I on a fairly high dose of this medication for someone who doesn't have bipolar? I decided to taper off with my doctor's help. I really want to see if I can feel decent off of this drug.

She suggested I could go down by 25mg a month. I tried this a few years back and it was really bad. It was just too much. So I decided to go super, super slow. The last three days I've gone down by 6.75mg. So my new dose being 268 something (I don't have the number in front of me lol) Today I had the worst panic attack I've had in a while. Legit thought that because I ate a greasy burger and ice cream that fat was rapidly accumulating clogging my arteries. I thought my heart was going to explode it was ridiculous. And I knew this as well but it doesn't make it feel any less real in the moment even if you can think logically.

I'm terrified that tomorrow I will already give up and go back to my usual dose. I would love to know if anyone successfully came off this drug. How did it positively affect yourself and your life? I'm looking for reasons to stick it out

Thank you

I take Lamotrigine 275mg

I'm wondering if anyone else has tapered off after being on this drug for a very long time? My body is so sensitive to medications etc. I've been on 275 mg for years. My new doctor thinks I don't have bipolar type 2. I agree with her. Last year I was diagnosed with ADHD, PMDD and anxiety. I know many of us have been misdiagnosed unfortunately.

Anyway, I started wondering who I am without this drug.. I was 21 years old when I started it. I was a raging alcoholic and drug user probably due to dopamine seeking from ADHD and trying to regulate my emotions. All of that fun stuff. That's not who I am anymore. I'm a 33 year old single mom who maybe has a half glass of wine at Christmas. I just got to thinking why am I on a fairly high dose of this medication for someone who doesn't have bipolar? I decided to taper off with my doctor's help. I really want to see if I can feel decent off of this drug.

She suggested I could go down by 25mg a month. I tried this a few years back and it was really bad. It was just too much. So I decided to go super, super slow. The last three days I've gone down by 6.75mg. So my new dose being 268 something (I don't have the number in front of me lol) Today I had the worst panic attack I've had in a while. Legit thought that because I ate a greasy burger and ice cream that fat was rapidly accumulating clogging my arteries. I thought my heart was going to explode it was ridiculous. And I knew this as well but it doesn't make it feel any less real in the moment even if you can think logically.

I'm terrified that tomorrow I will already give up and go back to my usual dose. I would love to know if anyone successfully came off this drug. How did it positively affect yourself and your life? I'm looking for reasons to stick it out

Thank you

This is our text conversation. I can't figure out how to post it as a picture.

He was basically mad because I lent my grandmother $20 instead of him. 35 year old man BTW and he's the reason my grandmother had to borrow money off of me just to eat 🤷🏻‍♀️ I'm terrified of him and always just block him instead of saying what I truly want to say. I was shaking so badly after. I'm still in fight or flight

Him: (I have taken out the real swear words)

F you f@t B

Ill never talk to you again

Me:

For someone who has called me a (redacted horrendous name calling) threatened me, had 4 police cars show up at my house banging in my windows at 3AM sirens and lights blaring looking for you while barging into my house, pretending to be me online making threats to (name redacted) you're lucky I even talk to you and you're s*** talking me to people as well. (my daughter's name) is almost seven and you've been to ONE of her birthday parties and stayed 20 minutes. Don't ever message me again.