Crazy post but I've just realized what it's like to be white... white and not unattractive
So starting this off by saying im not unattractive myself, just a poc. Wouldnt say im the prettiest of a bunch but yk the deal. Anyways, today I was out with my friend and her mom, ...and older ladies and other folk just felt comfortable coming up to us, moreso them. Kinder, gentler. When we sat with them on a bench, it was like I was making them uncomfortable if I saw on their side and not towards the edge. It really hit me because im not even one that thinks about privilege much if at all.
Its like they didnt see them as other, or I dont even know WHAT it was, and while trying to place what the difference there was. It was because my friend and her mom were white. Ive never experienced anything like that so blatantly out in the open like that. In conversations only adressing my friend and her mom even though for all they know they couldnt even be related. not even looking once at me. Like they were the safe person. Like I was exotic. I felt chills. But I also felt jealous
OF COURSE im proud of who I am, but i'd be kissing myself if it didnt make my heart pang knowing someone is living like that. They dont have to worry about who they are. I also dont even live in a predominantly white area, but EVEN OTHER POCS! Felt more comfortable with them. Idk, I feel like today my eyes have opened.