i checked my CGPA today and just stared at the screen because i genuinely wasn’t expecting that
okay so results came out today and i opened my portal already preparing myself mentally for disappointment
because honestly my CGPA has stressed me out for SO long now
like university has not gone the way i imagined at all
when i first got admitted i really thought i’d be one of those organized students who studies on time, stays consistent, gets good grades naturally and has everything under control
meanwhile real me was procrastinating, panicking before exams, pulling random late-night study sessions and then regretting every life decision the next morning
some semesters were genuinely so bad mentally too
like i’d try to study but my brain just wouldn’t cooperate and then seeing other people casually talking about their high CGPAs used to make me feel even worse
there were times i literally avoided calculating my CGPA because i knew it would ruin my mood
and every semester i kept telling myself “okay next one will be better”
sometimes it was a little better… sometimes not really
this semester honestly wasn’t perfect either
i still procrastinated, still got stressed, still had moments during exams where my brain completely blanked out for no reason
but i think one thing changed this time
i stopped waiting to become some “perfect motivated student” before doing anything
even if i studied for one hour, i counted it
even if my notes were messy, i still kept going
and somehow all those small messy efforts added up
today when i checked my updated CGPA… it actually improved more than i expected
and i swear i just sat there staring at the screen because my brain genuinely couldn’t process it at first
like wait… this is MY CGPA now (3.59)??
it’s probably not a huge deal to everyone else but for me it feels emotional honestly
because after feeling stuck for so long, finally seeing improvement feels really personal
like maybe all those stressful nights weren’t completely useless after all
anyway yeah… i’m just really proud of myself today
congrats me