Why does happiness come easy for some people and not others?
I was thinking back on my life recently. I went through depression, anxiety, and a lot of dark moments when I was younger, just like everyone else. But now when I look back at it, I feel like a big reason for it was just being young and inexperienced, not really understanding life yet.
As I got older, my perspective changed completely (23 now). I stopped focusing on things outside of my control, and I started appreciating small things more. Sometimes my dumbass will just sit over a bowl of rice and genuinely feel happy that I’m able to eat and have a meal in front of me and I often catch myself doing the same thing with a piece of gum and so on.
What’s strange to me now is that almost nothing makes me sad anymore. It’s become concerning, even when someone close to me dies, I’ll feel sad for a very short period and I’m back to happy again and if I think about it again it doesn’t change my happiness and I just see it as a natural occurrence now, while my relatives grief for a while. I don’t feel sad when I lose a lot of money or I’m stressed or something didn’t work out. My errand car (new car) literally got stolen 3 days ago, and I felt no sadness or stress about it at all. Literally nothing makes me sad anymore. I could be going through some tragic shit and I don’t have a sip of sadness inside of me, like I’m just happy as I’m going through whatever it is. When it comes to the death of a loved one, I’ll feel sad for a very very short period and I’m back to normal as if I just didn’t lose someone.
And before anyone judges my character and thinks I’m a bad or isolated person, I’m not. I’m actually a very caring and sympathetic person. I treat people with respect and I try to be fair with everyone. I am a people’s pleaser, especially with my family. I’m also very social. If you are an introvert you’d probably hate me more than anything. That’s why this feels confusing to me. I should at least grief like a normal person or feel sad when I lose someone or when something major happens. I don’t really understand why I changed like this.
part of me wonders if it’s normal to be like this. I don’t think it is.
Does anyone else feel this way?