I've been experiencing a mental relapse for weeks now. I've been in therapy every week since I started. I'm on meds. I exercise. I look for healthy dopamine and have read 6 books in the last few months. I attend discord chats regularly. But my cravings are at an all time high. From what I've read, cravings and mental relapses indicate something is missing or I'm avoiding something. How can I figure out what's missing in my recovery?
What have long time leavers done to go from a mental relapse back to a path of sobriety?
I bought a joint on Friday. Tore it up last night and bought another joint on the way home today. It promptly got taken away by my spouse who holds me accountable. I'm tired of feeling like this. The cognitive dissonance of wanting to be sober and thinking I can moderate is exhausting.