Mom texted me that she has cancer
I haven’t seen her in years and haven’t talked to her apart from saying thanks to her happy birthday email each year. She never tried to reach out any more than that. We always had a strained relationship but it got worse as I got older. My parents divorced when I was a teen and she never forgave me for "choosing" my dad, who was not abusive and actually really fucking nice to me.
She texted me during my shift today to let me know she was back home from surgery and that she has colon cancer. She told me she was reaching out because her surgeon said I should regularly get checked out as it is often hereditary. She wrote that had she known that was the case, they could’ve caught it earlier but that at least now I know because she told me.
I haven’t replied. Part of me feels extremely guilty. I feel like it’s my fault the relationship was ruined and that the least I could do is to text her back. Another part of me is thinking that this was NOT the way to tell me she is sick and feels extremely manipulative, like she’s reaching out for my own good, to inform me that I need a regular colonoscopy. Like I’m being an ungrateful and terrible daughter if I ignore her. And maybe I am, I don’t know. I’m just scared to get sucked back into a relationship with her if I do message her back.